Hey lovely bloggers 💕,
This blog post is coming right from my heart. Something that I can relate to in all the ways. I’m a highly sensitive person. Highly sensitive persons have nervous systems that are more sensitive than others and they process things more deeply. In other words, they feel more and love more. In another blog post I will explain more about being a highly sensitive person.
I have always been a giver. I give, give and give. I have always been the one that pleased people. I have always been the one that loves more and deeply. I have always wanted to make sure everybody was happy. I never thought of myself. It was always them, never about me.
This can be a good thing but when you give too much and receive too little it can be a real problem in your life. If you only give and you aren’t receiving as much back you can really feel out of energy and tired.
I stayed friends with people who made abuse of this situation. I found it hard to let friends go because you have a history with them. Now if I look back, I think by myself were that really my friends? Friends wouldn’t gossip about you, say rude comments and bully you.
I had a two year long distance relationship from 17 till 19 years old. He was from Switzerland and I was living in The Netherlands by that time. We were both young and crazy in love. Even in that relationship I felt like I loved him more than he loved me. I always felt like he had to say to me a million times “I love you” to make sure that he loved me. It’s my anxiety that made me feel like I was just never good enough. I was afraid to loose him. I have been bullied during my high school a lot and I think that was also the reason why I needed a constant afirmation that he loved me and that I was good enough for him. He broke up with me after two years. Life separated our ways. It wasn’t meant to be. I was lost for almost 4 years. I missed him like crazy, my first love…. It’s now when I feel more like myself again.
I love this beautiful quote from R.M. Drake. This is a beautiful writer on Instagram and has also written some amazing books. Go check him out! 💕 Why do I love people so much and
give them the best of me when I know they don’t derseve it at all? Why do I do this all the time? Really WHY? I think it’s because I always want everybody to be happy. I always think the best of people and care way too much. I always believe in the good of people. It’s just the way I’m.
Until today I still keep thinking of this beautiful quote which I found on Tumblr:
If I may answer this question, I would say definitely YESSSS! I am a highly sensitive person and that’s also the reason why I love and feel more. I really believe that there are people out in the world who give more love than they will ever receive back.
I used to believe it’s a curse to feel so much and love so hard but I began to realize it’s a blessing. I realized that it’s okay to love hard and feel everything so deeply. It’s a strength. We need more healers, dreamers and people who care about people in this sometimes dark world.
In order to be more in sync with my feelings I have to do these things:
- I have to set boundaries with people
- I have to let the past go (I’m doing much better than before)
- I have to be surrounded only by people who really care about me such as my real friends and family
- I have to say more NO
- I have to love myself first before I fall in love again
- I should stop pleasing people
- I should make myself a priority before anybody else
I am in the process of all of these points. I am loving myself much more than when my first love broke up with me. I broke some friendships because those weren’t my friends. I say more no to things. However, I still have to do it all even more.
I am happy to love so much because that makes me feel alive. This is the way I’m and I’m not going to change that. I just have to make sure which people are the right people to love. We need people who love hard in this world.
A world without people that love so much as I do is a dark world without flowers…