Hey lovelies 💕,
I’m back from my trip to Somo, Santander last Tuesday. I just went three days. I will soon share a blog post about this trip and a photo diary. Today I want to share something I really need to write about which is about how to face your fears. It’s just going to be some personal tips. Maybe they will not all be helpful for everyone. Feel free to add a tip in the comment section. I’m also sharing how I’m going to overcome my dentist fear. Facing a fear is a topic which I struggle a lot with because of suffering from anxiety. I know everyone gets nervous or can be scared of something. People suffering from a mental illness can experience it so bad that they feel physical and emotional symptoms. I always feel extremely anxious when I do something I’m afraid of.
When I get high anxiety, I can feel very emotional, cry a lot, feel like I’m dying, feeling nauseous, dizzy, hiperventilation and feel a racing heart beat and so many more symptoms. It’s really the worst. I know we all get scared but when you suffering from an anxiety disorder a fear can become a real obstacle in life. Maybe, you all know about the fight, freeze or flight response. When you are in a situation you fear you can either fight and go for it and overcome it. You can also do nothing and just freeze. You can also flight which is the one I always do. I’m way too good at escaping everything I fear in life. I will cover myself in blankets in bed and will think what a peaceful and lovely world. The world is full of danger but in my world and my bed I’m safe and sound. I know it isn’t a great way.
It’s so important to overcome our fears. When we overcome our fears we grow as a person. I have let fears consume my life and because I run away from them they only became bigger which is worse for my anxiety. It becomes a much more struggle when we run away from everything we fear then when we face it. I know it’s easier said than done. I still have to practice and learn a lot. Now, I’m going to share 10 tips on how I think you can overcome a fear.
1. Journal about your fear
It doesn’t matter which fear you have. Are you scared of snakes, flying, public speaking, hospitals or anything else? I find it great to write about my fear like I do on my blog or in my journal. Whenever you write about your fear it feels like you can let it a bit go. Write down why you are afraid and some experiences in the past with this fear. Analysing a fear is important as you can come to a conclusion why you have this fear. For example, I fear public speaking not because I don’t like to talk to people. I fear public speaking because I don’t like to be in the middle of attention and I don’t like it because I’m afraid to make a fool out of myself. I’m afraid to fail and embarrass myself in front of all people.
2. Take little steps to overcome your fear
If you fear something it’s important to face a fear with baby steps. If you are afraid of travelling on your own then I think it’s not a good idea to go and travel the whole world on your own at once. You can for example take little trips in your country and then for example in your continent and then when you are ready you will be able to overcome your fear and can travel the world. Taking little steps will give you the courage to overcome your fear. It helps me a lot to not feel overwhelmed about a big fear.
3. Feel your feelings and accept them
If you feel anxious or scared feel it and admit that you are anxious. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. You have the right to feel this way. If you are hiding and bottlling up your emotions, one day you will break down because it will be too much for you. Accept that you are afraid to do something. Even when you feel like a fear can consume you, you have to know that you have the power and control over it. You can control your fears.
4. Believe in yourself
It’s important when you are going to overcome a fear to believe in yourself. If you are constantly saying negative things about yourself you will only feel worse. Say to yourself I can do this. I can overcome this fear even though I’m anxious. I’m a warrior 💪🍀 How many times did I think I couldn’t do something and at the end I could do it because I felt strong enough to face my fears. We all have that strength in us.
5. Think of all the positive things you’ve achieved in your life
To think back of all your victories in life is a great way to feel positive about facing your fear. You have done something scary before and you could do it. The feeling of achieving something you felt scared of is just so great. It’s a great emotion and can make you feel stronger to constantly facing a fear in life whether it’s a big or a little fear.
6. Get help and support from your friends and family
I love to know that I’ve a lovely family and some good friends who will always be there for me. It can really help to have a great tribe of people who encourage you when you have to face a fear. Their support and encouragment can make a huge difference. I remember how scared I was to do my speech at the United Nations in NYC a few years ago. My family and good friends encouraged me and said that I could do it. I started to feel positive. Whenever I don’t believe in myself they will always believe in me. We are our worst enemies right. We have to be our inner best friends and tell us that we can do it.
7. Take action
I know so many times that I think of something I fear and I just don’t take action and only think about the fear. This will not solve anything at all. I remember so many times that I was for example afraid of doing an exam because I was afraid to fail. I ended up not doing the exam. Then, I learned for the exam and I made the exam and I passed. Taking action on facing a fear is so important. You can’t let the fear rule your life. Action builds courage and strength.
8. Know the difference between a rational and irrational fear
A great way to face a fear is analysing a fear and asking yourself questions. A rational fear is a real fear which can be a death or an illness. An irrational fear is a fear of something harmless or potentially dangerous, but whose probability of occuring is low or not possible. For example, if I know one of my family members has cancer and the doctor says he has a posibility to die then it’s a rational fear.
I have always had more irrational fears in my life. For example, whenever I’m flying I think the airplane will crash and get myself very anxious. Of course, it can happen but the facts show that flying is way more safer than riding a car and that the possibility to die in a plain crash is really low. Airplane have the newest technology and there are 1000000 airplanes flying every second. It’s good to distinct your fears. Ask yourself if it’s worth to be fearful and if there’s a high chance that the thing you fear will come true or if your mind is playing tricks with you. Most of the things I was anxious about never happened.
9. If you can’t overcome a fear alone ask for a friend or family member to come with you
I always go to the doctors or dentist with my mother or father. I prefer to go with someone I trust and who can help me to overcome that fear. If I go alone I would feel even more anxious. You don’t have to do it your alone. It’s okay to ask for help. It’s also much easier to face your fear with someone then on your own.
10. Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts
I know this one is easier said than done. I just believe so much in the law of attraction. Energy never lies and we attract the things we feel and think. I have had moments in my life that I thought every bad thing was happening to me. When I began to think more positive thoughts I could feel the good energy flowing into my life. I remember a time that I lost something and find it back. I remember when I helped a man find a hostel here in Valladolid and then he invited me for a free diner in a tapas restaurant. Negative thoughts will only make you more fearful. Positive thoughts will make you believe you can overcome your fear and you will 💪💕 We are all in this together.
As I’m done sharing my 10 tips of overcomig a fear I would like to share a little bit more about my dentist fear and how I’m going to overcome it. Last Wednesday was a very emotional and nerve-wracking day. I had an appointment with the dentist here in Valladolid. I have problems with my wisdom teeth as you already know. I knew I had to go to the dentist to ask a second opinion here in Spain. After two years of postponing it I went to check it. I went with my mother. They made a picture of my teeth. One woman at the reception asked me to sign a paper and she asked if I take medication. I was silence and then told her I take antidepressants and that I have anxiety. I still find it hard to open up about my mental health illness even to doctors. I don’t want that they think I’m crazy. Then I had to wait for a while and finally it was time to enter the scary room of the dentist haha 😂😨
The first thing I did when I sat down on the dentist chair was crying. I cried so much. I felt ashamed to be so anxious and that I had to cry. He said: “it’s okay you can cry.” I was thinking like what?! I can be sensitive and cry hell yes 👊. He said: “I also cry.” I find that really amazing that he said that because there are so many men who say they never cry and appear strong. We all cry. We are all human. He checked my teeth and said I had caries in the four wisdom teeth. They all need to be pulled out. This scared me a lot. He told me I don’t have to worry because I will not feel any pain. He will give me medication and antibiotics. He even said if I wanted to do it today or tomorrow lol I was like no way. The assistant came and said yes you can do it tomorrow. The he said don’t pressure her, you can decide it. I have never felt so understood and comfortable at the dentist. Besides, he is so handsome omggg 😍
I made an appointment to get one pulled out one monday. I hope I’m not going to cancel the appointment because of way too much fear. I’m still scared as hell. I tell myself it’s going to be okay. He said it will only take 15 minutes. I told him too about having anxiety in life and searching for a job. He said that I’ve to accept that your dream job doesn’t come at once. Everything takes time. I have to face my fears which is just so true. I have to stop running away from everything I fear. I can do this 🙏 I will take an anti anxiety medication on Monday and the night before. The other 3 wisdom teeth will be pulled out when I’m back in Spain. Just one at a time. That’s the best for me. I’m a warrior 💪💪
Thank you all for reading. I hope you learned a lot about these 10 tips in facing a fear. I hope you can you use them too in your daily lives. We are all fighters 💪 We can go through it all together. Can you relate to these tips? How would you face a fear? Do you also have dentist anxiety and how are you overcoming this fear? Did you ever get a tooth pulled out? Let me know in the comments your thoughts and experience.
Much love 💕,