Today it’s my 26th birthday! πŸ˜πŸŽ‚πŸŽ‰πŸŽβœ¨πŸŽˆ Forever young yeahhh!

Hola lovelies πŸ’•,

IT’S MY BIRTHDAY TODAY (First of June) OMGGG! I’m getting old πŸ‘΅ haha no kidding I’m just turning 26 but it feels like I’m already almost 30 or 100 lol. I have so much back pain lately. I really need to do some yoga and go swimming. It’s still 4 years till I’m 30 but yeah time is ticking away and not standing still. This blog post will be about my birthday and what I have learned this year. June is one of my favourite months because it’s also almost Summer which is my fav season ever! Summer vibes aloha! πŸ˜πŸŒŠπŸŒžπŸ„β€β™€οΈ Summer time and the living is easy as they say. I’m in Spain again since Tuesday so I’m very happy. It’s 30 degrees right now! 😍🌞 I hope I will stay this happy until the heatwave πŸ”₯ come πŸ˜‚πŸ˜­ Send help.

Before I will tell you all what I have learned this year I have to admit you something. I wrote this blog post this week but right now I’m adding this text. I’m crying right now in my bed 😒 as it’s the middle of the night. I feel strange to admit this because it feels like you have to be happy on your birthday. Birthdays come with so many expectations which I hate. I love to celebrate it with my friends and family. I just don’t like that I’m thinking now that I don’t have my life together. It’s just hard to live in a world where you feel more than the average person as I’m also a highly sensitive person.

I have good friends but everyone is living their lives while I’m just standing still because of being anxious. I feel like I can be myself more on the internet when I blog than in real life. I’m always hiding myself because of being bullied when I was younger. Somehow it still hurts me. I’m a very open person and love to be honest but I’m afraid to open up nowadays to people who I don’t know well. I don’t want to get hurt again or experience a broken heart again. I guess I just needed this cry and vent it all out. I’m always here for you all too πŸ’— I wish we could all meet each other soon. I need to heal myself and my heart. I need to find more people who understands me and who I can be friends with. It sucks to have so many good internet friends which don’t live in the same country as me.

I went to a lot of concerts this year which I’m so thankful for. I love seeing my favourite artists live. Music means the world to me 🎢 I love singing as I used to sing in a choir for 11 years. Hopefully I will do something again with singing in my life this year. I need it. Singing makes me feel free, release my emotions and just makes me so happy. Music is life. I went to the concert of Spanish singer-songwriter Sofia Ellar with my friend Maria in Spain. I also went to the concert of Pablo Alboran in June, Hombres G, Celtas Cortos, OperaciΓ³n Triunfo and Chenoa with my mother during the week of fiestas in Valladolid in September. When I came back in Holland I went to see Vance Joy live with my best friend in Amsterdam. Last night I enjoyed a beautiful concert of Alfred Garcia which I know from the Spanish talentshow OperaciΓ³n Triunfo. It was amazing to go to this concert and have fun with my friend. It was an unforgettable concert! 😍🎢 Such a great way to start my birthday! πŸŽ‰

I learned this year that my good and real friends and family will always be there for me no matter what. Distance doesn’t matter when the friendship is real. I’m also thankful for all the old and new friends I made in the blogging community, mental health community, Yoga Girl community and pen pal world. I’m so thankful for all the support, love and inspiration I get every day. My life wouldn’t be the same without you all. My biggest wish is to meet you all and hug you all in person πŸ’• I’m so thankful to know you all. It definitely makes me feel less alone when I’m struggling and also makes me feel more inspired and happy.

Beautiful snail mail from my pen pals
I always get beautiful pen pal letters from Sophia and Rosie ❀

I love writing πŸ“ so much as it’s such a good tool to let everything go. I love to blog and use my insta to spread awareness of important topics such as feminism, mental health, self love, self care, and much more. Some topics are still a taboo so it’s important to spread awareness about them and make people feel less alone. I wish to one day be able to maybe write a book of poetry or something. That would be a dream coming true 🌟. I wish to be able to connect with more people and inspire more people. Most of all I just wish to spread love, happiness and make this world a better place to live in πŸŒπŸ’—

A poem I made some years ago

This year I began to read books again. I was only reading some magazines before of psychology but I also wanted to read again like I used to do during my childhood. I missed the feeling of reading and being in another world. I read some amazing books this year such as “The sun and her flowers” by Rupi Kaur, “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho, “Am I normal yet?” by Holly Bourne and “Turtles all the way down” by John Green. I’m now reading some other books and I will post a review when I’m finished. Reading also makes me feel less alone and makes me happy. There are so many good books out there to be read so hopefully this new year ahead will be a good reading year for me. I’m a slow reader but I will get there hahaha πŸ˜‚πŸ“š

I also learned this year to face some of my fears. I still have a lot of fears to face but I’m getting there step by step even though it’s hard when you suffer from anxiety. I still have a hard time asking for help when I need it. I feel like I can’t ask for help because it makes me feel stupid or weak when it isn’t true. Sometimes we bottle everything up which makes us feel worse. At the end it’s better to let everything out even though it’s scarry. I went to the dentist in Spain for an appointment and they told me all my 4 wisdom teeth need to get out. I’m still so scared as hell to do this one day 😒😭. I know I have to because otherwise I will get problems since they have cavities. I just don’t know how to survive the anxiety about this.

I also am still having a hard time finding a job in Spain. However, last week I got an email for an interview for a shop but I couldn’t be there as I was in Holland. I also did an interview in April for an internship in the best hotel in Spain. Unfortunately, I never got an email back. I guess it’s because I can’t do an internship since I’m not studying anymore. Anyway, I did the interview and that’s still an achievement as well because I was so anxious πŸ’ͺ I keep applying to some interesting jobs I see.

4 pictures made into a collage about my internship interview

This year I learned to celebrate every little and big achievement. They all mean a lot to me. Having anxiety makes life even harder so overcoming a fear is a big deal for me. I have to be proud of myself and not be hard on myself. Every year with my birthday expectations comes that I don’t have my life together but who cares. I’m just living each day and making the best of it. I will hopefully achieve my dreams even though it takes time and pacience ✨

I have also learned that I need to travel more to unknown places. I went to Granada again last Summer with my mother for the third time. I loved it 😍 It was great to see my friend again and enjoy the beach. I also love to discover new places such as the surfing village Somo in the north of Spain near to Santander. I went there in September with my mother and we enjoyed it so much. I can’t wait to go surfing there this Summer as I didn’t surf for many years. I really miss it πŸŒŠπŸ„β€β™€οΈ. I also traveled to LeΓ³n with my mother in March. It’s a beautiful city just one hour away from Valladolid. The tapas were delicious and the cathedral was so beautiful with all the stained glass windows. It was our first time in a spa hotel 🏩 which was so relaxing. I loved the swimming pool and whirlpool πŸ›€. I can’t wait to do that again. You just gotta treat yourself.

One of the most beautiful moments of my 25th year was the wedding of my brother with his Spanish wife. The Spanish wedding was really a big moment of last Summer πŸ’’ πŸ’πŸ€΅πŸ‘°. It was beautiful to be there and to witness the love of two people. It was amazing to be all together with the family and celebrate that love. It was an unforgettable day. Maybe one day I will have that fairytale aswell πŸ§šβ€β™‚οΈ even though I believe that the most important relationship you can have in your life is with yourself. Loving yourself and respecting yourself is so important. You are already whole before you are in love with someone. Always remember that.

For the rest, I also enjoyed some time with my friends in Spain and in The Netherlands. We had fun and ate delicious tapas together. I also saw my whole family a lot. I love to see everyone especially my little niece. She slept at our house for the first time in March. It was a lot of fun and it was also tiring πŸ˜‚. It’s great that our family is growing. I also went for the first time in my life to a cremation of a girl who died because of leucemia from my choir. It was a beautiful ceremony. It was heartbreaking too πŸ’”.

I have a fear of death so it was also again overcoming a fear of mine to go. I also went for the first time to a tulip flower fields in The Netherlands with my mother which was so beautiful to experience! 😍🌷 I also swam a lot last Summer and I’m going to do the same this year. Swimming is so good for your health. I love the outdoor swimming pools in Spain so much 😍πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ΈπŸŠ

So it was a beautiful year with ups and downs like every year have. I’m still on my way of achieving my dreams and hopefully I will make them all come true ✨ I hope you will all be in this journey with me and never ever leave me. I will be there for you all too of course. We are all in this together πŸ’ͺπŸ’• Let’s rise each other up, be kind to each other and love each other 🌠. That’s what the world needs more of.

If one thing I know for sure is that I’ll always try to make this world a better place to live in because we live on such a beautiful planet! I love La Pachamama! 🌍

I wish you all peace, love & happiness! Forever young, wild and free! ✌️ We are all childs of the universe. This life is a gift ✨ Thank you all for reading this blog post. I will speak to you all in my next post. In my next blog post I will share more pictures of my birthday, what I did on my birthday and the presents and cards I got from my family and friends πŸŽπŸ’Œ.

My mother gave me this beautiful balloon for my birthday 🎈 It says congratulations Chris without the H haha like they say it in Spanish πŸ˜‚ Purple is one of my fav colours πŸ’œ

Love you all so much πŸ˜πŸ’žπŸ’–,

xoxo Christina

April favourites πŸŒ·πŸŒΌπŸ’πŸŒ»

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

Today I will share with you all my favourites of the month April. I can sum up that I saw many beautiful flowers πŸ’πŸŒ·πŸŒΈπŸŒΉπŸŒΌ, had a lot of fun with my family, wrote a lot of pen pal letters, received some beautiful letters and celebrated the birthday of my brother and his wife. I will tell you all about it and also show you with some nice pictures. I hope you will like it.

Some things I did:

Internship interview

At the beginning of April I was in Spain and had to do an internship interview at the 5 stars hotel 🏩 πŸ‡ with the vine yards. It went pretty well even though I was suffering from so much anxiety and I thought I wouldn’t be able to cope. I’m proud I faced my fear. I wrote about my whole experience in this blog post.

4 pictures made into a collage about my internship interview

Tulip fields in The Netherlands 🌷

I went to see the tulip fields in The Netherlands with my mother on Easter. It was so beautiful and magical to see! 😍🌷✨ I have never been to these tulip fields. You can see more of the pictures I took in my photo diary post. I’m happy I grew up in a country full of flowers. Flower power always! πŸ’ I’m forever a hippie girl! ✌️

Me with beautiful red tulips with a quote

Bloemencorso in Haarlem

I went to the Bloemencorso in Haarlem with my mother. We loved it so much as we both love flowers. It’s been many years since I didn’t go because I was in Spain. I always go whenever I get the chance because it’s a unique event in Haarlem. It’s definitely my favourite event ever! 😍 Flowers make me so happy. They are so colourful and beautiful 🌼🌻. They also smell so good. Flowers make this world better. It’s also called Flower Parade. It’s every year. The first prize was for the one with the 🐍, 🐒, and 🐲. The second prize was for the one you can see on the picture which is called “Rise of the phoenix”. The third prize was for the one with the tulips from Keukenhof. They are all so beautiful. We loved them.

It’s incredible how they all make this with flowers. It takes a lot of work. They mostly use hyacinths, tulips and daffodils. It always amazes me. Lots of tourists come to Haarlem to see this event. So yeahhh, visit Haarlem and go to Keukenhof which is the beautiful tulip park in Lisse 🌷 You will not regret it 😍

Bloemencorso in Haarlem

Lovely things I did with my family πŸ‘ͺ:

Eating pancakes πŸ₯ž

I didn’t celebrate King’s Day in The Netherlands which was the 27th of April. This day we celebrate the birthday of our King. It was bad weather and I also didn’t felt well because of stomach cramps before my period so I stayed at home. I enjoyed the day writing cards and eating delicious pancakes which are called Pannenkoeken in Dutch. My daddy always makes the most delicious ones! πŸ˜‹πŸ˜ It’s definitely one of my favourite food ever.

Delicious pancakes made by my daddy

Fondue with the family

I ate delicious Dutch fondue with potatoes, huzaren salad and as dessert vanilla ice cream and fruits. It was all so delicious mmm! We celebrated the birthday of my brother Rafael and VerΓ³nica together with my parents.

Dutch fondue with the family

Easter time πŸ°πŸ‡πŸ£πŸ’—

I celebrated Easter Monday with the whole family. My two brothers, their wifes, and my little niece came to our house. It was so nice to be all together. It was also 25 degrees so we could all enjoy a delicious lunch with a boiled egg in the gardenπŸ₯š My little niece was also playing with water πŸ’¦ in the garden and was making me wet with a spray haha it was really fun. We also went to play with her in the park. I had such a nice day with my lovely family who I love so much 😍

Enjoying Easter time with my family and a delicious breakfast

Birthday party of Rafael and VerΓ³nica πŸŽ‰πŸŽ‚πŸŽˆπŸŽ

My mother and I went to the home of my brother to celebrate his birthday and the one of VerΓ³nica. It was nice to see their lovely friends again and eat delicious food πŸ˜‹ We ate delicious soup haha my brother loves soup as much as I do. We also ate cheese πŸ§€, nachos with guacamole sauce which I love so much, chips, olives, bread, and much more. There was also a red sauce from Bulgeria which I really loved. I gave them two cards I made and some presents including beautiful roses 🌹

Celebrating the birthday of my brother and his wife with delicious food

Spring time in the park

We had a week of good weather 🌞 in The Netherlands so I could enjoy the sunshine in my garden. We also enjoyed some walks in the park. I also enjoyed a delicious Easter breakfast with a boiled egg, bread, croissant and orange juice. Before we went to see the flower fields we went for a nice bike ride through the park near to my house. We also took the ferry which is for free and you can go with the bike. It’s so nice to enjoy the river the Spaarne in Haarlem πŸš²πŸ’—β›΄οΈ

Enjoying Spring time from the ferryboat with my mother

Other awesome things of April πŸ’•:

Tickets to fly to Spain are booked πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Έ

I’m going to Spain at the end of May until at least mid September with my mother. I hope that I can find a job too and I also can’t wait to enjoy Summer time and go surfing! πŸ˜πŸ„β€β™€οΈ Summer in Spain is the best.I always spend my Summers there. It’s always sunny, 30 or even 40 degrees. I love sunshine 🌞. Summer is my favourite season but 40 degrees is too much for me hahah. In The Netherlands it can rain a lot in the Summer so I better be in Spain. I also love to travel with my friends and mother to the beach. I can’t wait to plan some awesome Summer plans!

300 followers on my blog πŸŽ‰

I’m so happy I reached more than 300 followers on my blog! It really mean the most to me that people read my blog, like it and comment. I love blogging. It makes me feel inspired and so happy. I hope my blog will continue to grow and I will continue to grow as a blogger too. Every day I learn something new. I love you all SO much 😍😍😍

Buying stationery

I bought some nice stationery in Spain and on Aliexpress. In Spain I bought all the smilies stickers and travelling stickers for just €1 in a Chinese Bazar. On AliExpress I bought beautiful writing paper. It’s difficult to find these in the shops so I preferred to buy it online. It costed €12 for 80 sheets from 8 different designs. I love the floral designs so much πŸŒΈπŸ’πŸŒΌπŸŒΊ

Nice stationery stuff, writing papers and stickers

Receiving beautiful letters from my pen pals πŸ˜βœ’οΈ

I love pen palling and I have some more pen pals right now. They all make me so happy. I received beautiful letters from them which I will cherish forever. I received beautiful letters from Sophia who always cheer me up and make me happy. She even sent me a beautiful handmade headband and earrings. I also love the cards she sent and the flowers seeds. I also received beautiful snail mail from Rosie. I loved the sticky notes and the cards with beautiful quotes. Finally, I also received a beautiful letter from Jess who sent me pretty sticky notes from Disney and stickers too. I love to make new friendships through writing πŸ“ It’s so therapeutic and so personal πŸ’—.

Thank you all for reading this blog post. What did you do in April? What was your favourite from my list? Do you also love pen palling? Let me know lovelies. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

Stationery haul πŸ’—πŸ“

Hola lovelies πŸ’•,

Today it’s time for again a haul post. I bought a lot of stationery stuff and also some other stuff I want to show you all. I’m just so addicted to buy stationery stuff. I use it to write letters to my friends, family and pen pals. There’s nothing better than receiving a handwritten letter. It never goes out of style.

These are all the things I bought:

Stickers, bouncing putty, socks and gel pens
Postcards set and cards with envelopes

Big stickers €1.50 each of them (Hema)

Stickers with hearts, moon and eyes
Big stickers with stars, quotes and hearts

I bought this beautiful two pack of stickers at the Dutch shop Hema. I love these stickers. They are really beautiful and creative. I love the heart stickers, the moon and the eyes.

Little stickers €1 each of them (Zeeman)

Summer stickers with ice-creams and sweets

I bought this nice stickers at the Dutch shop Zeeman. The stickers on the left are so cute. It gives me Summer vibes as there are ice-creams, milkshakes and other sweets 🍬🍧πŸ₯€. The stickers on the right are also so nice. I especially love the sticker Okay? Okay. because it reminds me of my favourite movie and book The fault in our stars by John Green.

Colourful gel pens €1 (Zeeman)

Colourful gel pens

I love gel pens so much. They write so well and the colours are beautiful. I used to use them a lot but many of them were broken so I had the perfect excuse to buy this set of gel pens. Also my favourites colours are blue, purple and violet.

Postcards pad €0.80 (Action)

Set of different postcards
Postcard with the text you are so loved and flowers
Postcard with the text amazing with flowers
Postcard with hearts
Postcard with a dandelion and quote
Postcard with the text choose joy and blue flowers
Postcard with the text positive vibes only in blue

Action is like the best shop to buy stationery stuff in The Netherlands. It has so many awesome things. I bought this set of postcards. I like to write postcards and send them. They are all so beautiful. I love the design, the flowers, the hearts and the beautiful letters. These are 12 designs and 24 postcards.

Postcards with scratch stickers €0.90 (Action)

Colourful postcards with scratch stickers
Postcard with a beautiful tree and quote
Postcard with a bee, quote and sunflower
Best friend forever postcard with hearts

I love these postscards because they have scratch stickers. I have never seen that before. You have to write in the white space and then you have to cover it with the scratch sticker which you can find at the end. It’s like a hidden message. The person who gets the postcard has to scratch the sticker to see the message. I think it’s such a cute idea 😍 I really love it. The postcasts are also very cute.

8 double cards deluxe with envelopes €0.80 (Action)

8 double deluxe cards with envelopes

These are so useful and I already was thinking of buying it. I love to make my own cards. It makes it more personal and special. It’s always useful to have this at home as well as the envelopes βœ‰οΈ.

Crazy bouncing putty €1 (Zeeman)

Set of colourful crazy bouncing putty

This isn’t stationery stuff but I wanted to include it in this post because I bought it the same day. I gave one to my friend and one is for myself. Bouncing putty is so nice. It’s soft, colourful and it bounces when you throw it on the ground. I love it. It’s great for releasing stress and anxiety πŸ’•. It’s so satisfying.

Colourful socks €3 (Hema)

Colourful socks
This was such a great set of socks which I bought the same day when I bought the stationery stuff. It was cheap as it were 5 socks for €3. I love the pineapple socks, the lines and the colours. I really needed socks so it was worth to buy them. You can never have enough colourful socks.

Thank you all for reading this blog post. What was your favourite item from my post? Do you also love to buy stationery as much as I do? What do you love to buy? Let me know in the comments. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

February favourites πŸŽ‰πŸŽΆ

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

I loved to make this post last month so I’m doing it again this month. It’s nice to write about your favourites things every month. I ate delicious food with my friends this month. I was happy to finally have fun with my friends again as I didn’t see them in so many months. I really missed it. I will also let you know other things I did, which serie I enjoyed this month, what my favourite music was this month & some other good things of February πŸ’—

My favourite music πŸŽΆπŸ’ž:

Ariana Grande – Thank u, next album

I basically only listened to the new album called Thank u, next of ARIANA GRANDE!!!! It’s so good. If you haven’t listened to it yet, do it! You won’t regret it. I have always liked her music but I consider myself definitely a fan of her now. I would love to go to her concert and meet her. She’s such a queen and I love her so much πŸ‘Έ. This album is so real, honest and so beautiful. My favourite songs are “Needy”, “Bloodline”, “Fake Smile”, “Thank u, next” and “Break up with your girlfriend, I’m bored.” I love all the songs, the lyrics and music so much but these are my favourites 🎢

My favourite serie I watched πŸ“Ί:

Amar es para siempre

I watch this Spanish serie every day of the week in the evening with my mother. We love it. This serie is already so many years on television. Love is forever is the title in English. It’s about different families and things happen. Right now, I love the story of Lusita and Amelia which is a lesbian couple. They are so cute together πŸ‘­πŸŒˆ. I love this story as it’s important for society to accept that love is love.

This serie is played in the 80s where in Spain society was still not so open for it so they have to hide all the time. I’m curious how the story will go. There’s also another story in this serie of a toxic relationship where a man called Gabriel is trying to make Natalia falling in love with him. She’s in love with his brother. It’s very complicated and Gabriel is really such a dangerous man. I hope she can escape and it will end well. We will see πŸ€—

My favourite movie I watched 🎬:

Valentine’s Day

I didn’t see this movie in a long time and I love it so much. It’s one of my favourite movies. It was the right time to see it this month πŸ’—. I love the actors so much such as Ashton Kutcher, Anne Hathaway, Taylor Lautner, Taylor Swift, Julia Roberts and Emma Roberts. Those are my favourites πŸ’•. I also loved the songs in the movie so much such as “Today was a fairytale” and “Jump then fall” by Taylor Swift. I always listened to these songs when I was in love and I still love them. I also love the song “Stay here forever” from Jewel so much. I like all the stories in this movie so much. At the end you never know how things will go but we all deserve good love.

DVD of Valentine's Day

My favourite gifts/things I got πŸ’•πŸŽ:

Valentine’s Day gifts

I may not have a romantic Valentine but I have my mommy who always gives me presents on Valentine’s Day 🌹. She makes me happy and feel less lonely on this day. It’s a day to celebrate love in all it’s forms. I love her so much. She’s the most important person in my life. She bought me delicious chocolate, a lavender bath bomb, a cute card and a bag. I also got the magazine Happinez which is a nice magazine full of wisdom, self care and self love tips. She got it for free from a woman in the shop who didn’t want it hahah better for me πŸ˜‚ I also gave some chocolate and presents to my best friend. She also gave me a card and a lovely present.

Receiving letters and a dress πŸ’ŒπŸ‘—:

I received a pen pal letter from my good friend Mollie which I met on Instagram. I love to receive letters so much. I also received a beautiful letter from one of my blogging best friends Chloe. I also bought a white dress from Daphne which I also met on Instagram. It was just €10 and I really love that dress. It’s perfect for this Spring and Summer time 🌞❀️ I love you all so much. Receiving something always makes me so happy.

My favourite trip we booked πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ΈβœˆοΈ:

Flight tickets to Spain

My father booked the flight tickets for me and my mother to go to Spain in March πŸ’•πŸŒžπŸŒŽπŸŒ». I can’t wait to go again as I have missed it so much. I’m already two months in The Netherlands. I can never stay too long in The Netherlands πŸ˜‚ I really feel sad and lonely this time. Sunshine makes me feel happy and less anxious. I feel like I lack so much energy these days to do anything.

I need the sunshine β˜€οΈπŸŒŠπŸ„β€β™€οΈ. I can’t wait to see my Spanish friends again and eat delicious tapas. I also am thinking of planning a trip to the beach and I would love to surf soon again. I just can’t wait to go away.

Quote of travelling with a map and airplane

My favourite food I have eaten 🍴:

Pancakes made by my daddy

Typical pancakes in The Netherlands are called pannenkoeken. I love the homemade pancakes made by my daddy so much! He always makes the best ones 😍πŸ₯žπŸ΄βœŒοΈ They were so delicious mmm.

Lunch at Cups and Leafs in Haarlem with my bestie πŸ’•

I finally saw my bestie after three months! 😍 I love Socialdeal. You can find on this website great discounts to eat in a restaurant. We had a delicious lunch at Cups and Leafs in Haarlem. It’s such a cute and cozy place. I love those kinds of lunch/tea places so much. We enjoyed a delicious tomato soup, a delicious bread with mozzarella, pesto, rucola and cherry tomatoes and a dessert. I had a chocolate dessert with biscuits and marshmallows and my bestie had a salt dessert. I had to take mine to home as I was so full πŸ˜‚. For drinks we enjoyed a delicious sunny berry juice and I had a wildberries smoothie. It was all so delicious! I can’t wait to go again. I love you πŸ’—

Drinking healthy smoothies, tomato soup and bread with mozzarella, pesto and rucola with my best friend in Cups of Leafs in Haarlem

Tapas night at Tapasbar El Pincho in Haarlem with my friends πŸ΄πŸ˜‹

I had such a great night on the 24th of February with my friends. My bestie and her girlfriend, two other good friends from my studies and one other friend I know came. I’m happy to finally meet up with a group of friends as it’s so much fun. We ate delicious Spanish tapas. This restaurant is so good as I already ate here two times and keep going back with my friends πŸ˜πŸ€—. We ate bread with tapanade and aioli, tortilla, jamΓ³n serrano, champignons, aubergine, vegetable croquettes, vegetables, olives, patatas bravas, and so much more. As dessert I had crema catalana which I love so much πŸ’• You could also choose pie with ice cream. Spanish vibes always πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Έ

Friends who love food are the best friends you can ask for 😍🍴We laughed and talked so much. I’m so grateful to have you all in my life. There was even a time my face hurt because of smiling and laughing so hard hahah that’s always a good sign of having fun. Friends forever πŸ’—πŸ’ƒLove you all so much 😘

Tea and apple pie at the Restaurant Cruquius with my mother

I enjoyed a nice bike ride with my mother in our park 🚲. It was sunny and about 12 degrees 🌞. Flowers are already growing in our garden. Spring time is coming soon. I can’t wait for Spring to finally arrive! πŸŒΈπŸ’ I’m so done with the cold winter brrrrrr. We went to the restaurant Cruquius to drink a delicious mint tea & apple pie with cream! πŸ˜πŸ˜‹ I have to go outside more and move more because it’s so good for your physical and mental health.

Other things I did πŸ’»πŸ΅:

Seeing my oldest brother and his wife – Family time πŸ‘ͺ

I’m happy that I saw my oldest brother Rafael and VΓ©ronica twice this month. We live 10/15 minutes away by car from them. One time me and my mother went to their apartment to drink a delicious mint tea and eat some cookies. The other time they went to our home to drink a tea with me and my parents and ate apple pie. It was nice to see them again. They also brought delicious chocolate for Easter πŸ«πŸ˜‹. I miss seeing my brothers. I wish to see my other brother, his wife and niece also soon. The last time we saw them was with Christmas πŸŽ„.

Took a lavender bath πŸ’—πŸ›€

My mother bought me a bath bomb of lavender for Valentine’s Day. I used it for the bath. It was so amazing. I love the colour, the smell and it’s just so relaxing 😍.

Applying for internships/Summer job and facing my fear

I applied to do an internship in a 5 stars hotel in Spain in a village near to Valladolid. It would be for 6 months. I would earn €250. It’s such a beautiful hotel. I loved looking to all the pictures online. It was a monastery and is totally restaurated. It has a spa, inside swimming pool and outside too. It’s a luxe hotel and is famous because of the vine yards πŸ·πŸ‡. I thought why not give an internship a try. The only thing is that for me it’s also important that I have Summer holidays as it’s the only time of the year I’m happy to enjoy the beach, swim in the ocean, have time with my friends, going to concerts, go surfing and travelling. I will have to mention that.

I was so anxious to do the Skype interview three weeks ago. I woke up with high anxiety and took a medication benzo to have less anxiety. That helped a lot as I was feeling so nauseous and bad. I was close to crying. It went very well as usually when I’m anxious to do something stressful. There were two people from the hotel interviewing me. I answered all the questions. I talked about my studies and I also talked in English. The only bad thing is that they would have to give me accommodation and food as it’s too far from our home there. However, I feel more safe in my home so I don’t know if I will feel comfortable in the hotel. You also need a certificate from your university and since I’m not studying anymore that would be impossible to get. Maybe, they don’t consider it important anymore. I got an email back last week that they want to do a personal interview when I’m in Spain. I guess that’s a good sign. I’m also so anxious to do that as I haven’t done that before. I’m just happy and proud of myself of facing my anxiety rather than always hiding from my fears πŸ’ͺ

I also applied for another internship at a 5 stars hotel in Valladolid. That’s also a spa hotel. There you would earn €400 and they could even hire you when you finish your internship. I applied to do a Summer job too which is to help at a surf school and surf camp in the north of Spain in Cantabria. You would get accommodation and food in return of working a few hours. You can also go surfing which is what I really want to do soon. It’s been way too long! πŸ„β€β™€οΈπŸŒŠ I will wait for all the answers. All of these things will not make me rich haha πŸ˜‚ but it’s worth the experience. What do you guys think? Let me know your thoughts.

Thank you all for reading my February favourites post. I hope you all enjoy it. It’s nice to focus on all the positive things during a month rather than always staying with the bad things. It’s much easier to think negative than positive. What were your favourites of my list? Do you also love to eat in a restaurant as much as I do? πŸ˜‹πŸ΄What did you enjoy last month? Let me know. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

Poem: That’s what real love is πŸ’•

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

I was just in the mood of writing poetry. I would love to share my last written poem with you all. It’s about loving a person for who they are. I wrote it for myself and for every woman out there who may feel this way. We all want to be loved for being ourselves. I hope you will like this poem.

That’s what real love is πŸ’•

She is vulnerable and sensitive

She is funny but oh so fragile

She is wild and crazy

She is beautiful and smart

She is romantic and creative

She is all you ever wanted

But

She is also the girl who cries herself to sleep

She can feel sad for no reason

She get anxious very fast

She has mood swings

She is sometimes hard to deal with

If you really want to love her you will have to love every part of her because that’s what love is about

Accepting the person for who they are and loving them unconditionally

Then you know it’s real love πŸ’•

Thank you all for reading this poem. I loved writing it. I always get inspired at night. Can you relate to it? Did you like this poem? Would you love to see more poetry that I wrote on my blog? ✨ I would love to know your thoughts. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

Fear of death

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

I wrote this post a few months ago. I wanted to share it now with you all. Today I will talk about one of my biggest fears in life and which is also a real trigger for my anxiety. I hope this blog post will not sound that weird but I just need to write my thoughts and feelings about this subject down here. This is the only safe space where I can just vent knowing that every strange thing I will write about will be accepted haha πŸ˜‚. I’m going to talk about my fear of death. Fear of death is also named thanatophobia. I know I had/have this my whole life.

Since I’ve been little I’ve always been thinking about life and death. I was always wondering about life. Since I began to realise that we’re all going to die one day I completely paralised. It makes my anxiety disorder worse because every time I begin to think about this I feel so anxious. It’s pretty strange too because when I had a panic attack or felt so anxious I remember times I said to myself: “I just want to die. I can’t live with this intense pain anymore.” The thing is, I don’t want to die because I’m afraid of dying. I’m afraid of life too because of anxiety. It’s a constant circle of thoughts. The thought that we are all going to die and that the sun and just this whole world will stop one day too makes me really feel so anxious.

I remember times I was talking with my best friend about this subject and she said to me that she wouldn’t want to live forever. I also think that it will not be great if you see everyone around you dying and you are the only one who lives forever. Maybe, it’s okay that one day everything stops but still it feels scary and strange. I always thought like okay a person can maybe live 100 years so I was always counting how many years that person still could live before they turn 100. I know maybe this sounds really crazy haha but I always do that πŸ˜‚. Then I think ohhh this person still can live 50 years for example and I get a bit happier about the fact that he/she still has many years to live.

When I’m getting really deep in my thoughts I also begin to think that this life is precious and fragile. One day you live, the next day you die. You never know when it will happen to you. I begin to think how amazing all those little things in life are as seeing the flowers blossom, listening to your favourite music, hearing the waves of the ocean crashing to the shore, listening to the singing of the birds and so many other things that we often take for granted. The fact that we are a human being that lives and breath on this earth is just a beautiful miracle ✨

I have also always been afraid of growing older because of this fear. I know I have to be happy about growing older because not everyone get that privilege. I know so many times that during my childhood kids would say: β€œI can’t wait to grow older”. I always thought to myself: β€œI want to stay this little forever.” Growing older for me also meant being bullied at highschool, my first break up, anxiety disorder and so many other problems in life. I loved being little and careless. Every year my birthday arrives I get anxious and begin to think about my life. One year less to live. I also begin to think about the fact that I’m not living the life I want and still not have achieved the things I dream of. I know I’ve time but it just makes me anxious to think of that time is running out.

The worst part of the fear of death is thinking about loosing my parents one day. I think that’s the worst part of it all. I can already feel the tears in my eyes coming. I’m crying right now. This thought sometimes keeps me up at night and I remember so many times that I was crying about this at night. I remember that I googled it so many times. I just don’t know how I would cope without my mother and father. I love them so much. Maybe, this fear comes also from my teenage years where I almost lost my father. When I was 11 years old my father got accute pancreatis because of taking a medicine for high cholestrol. This was a side effect of that medicine. He had to go through 5 surgeries in 5 years of being ill. Basically, they cut a lot of his organs because he had so many complications during these years. I almost lost my father when I was just 11 years old 😒. A few times he was really in life danger and almost died.

I just remember how I was crying and praying that he would live. This fear of death was so real because I just felt it in all my bones. I’m so happy he survived it. He has now diabetics because they also cut his pancreatis to have no infection anymore. He’s living with that illness and hopefully he will live many more years. He still goes to controls every year. Even though I have a better relationship with my mother because she understand me so well I love them both of course. The thought of loosing my father or mother is just the worst. They are the ones who brought you to life and loosing them will make you feel like you are loosing something of yourself.

The worst thing about it is that I know of course that this will happen one day. Also when I think of loosing my best friends, brothers, family members or other loved ones it makes me so unbelievable sad. I don’t want to live in a world without them. I know I will have to. I never went to a funeral until last year in October. Lisa, a girl from my choir, died from leucemia. I went with my mother to this cremation. It was really a beautiful ceremony. I only saw the closed coffin. I’m glad I conquered this fear and went for the first time in my life. I know I will always have this fear but hopefully it will become better within time.

Maybe, death is also our teacher. After I went to this funeral I begin to think about life. When people die around you it teach you that life is fragile and that you only have one life. β€œLove the life you live. Live the life you love” as Bob Marley says ❀️. We have to always listen to our hearts and follow our dreams. I long of inspiring people and helping other people in need. I want to make this world a better place to live in. I want to travel the world. I have so many dreams that I want to achieve. This life is beautiful and death is part of it. Life is everything between birth and death. I hope I can let my mind become more still and less anxious about this fear of death. Let us all enjoy life and be happy. That’s what matters the most.

Thank you all for reading this blog post. Do you also have a fear of death? Can you relate to it? I would love to know your thoughts of this topic in the comment section. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

A to Z of my favourite things in life πŸ’•

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

I always wanted to make this blog post. I saw many bloggers doing this too. I’m going to make a list from A to Z of my favourite things which makes me happy in life. I hope you are going to like this post and be inspired by it. I’m only choosing one word or more for every letter because it’s difficult for me to choose only one hahaha πŸ˜‚.

A – Art 🎨

I love art. The earth without art is just eh is one of my favourite quotes. It’s just so true. Art is beautiful. I love to go to museums and I really want to go more and enjoy paintings. I love every form of art such as paintings, photography, music, literature and dancing.

B – Books πŸ“š

Omgggg hell yeah books are one of my favourite things in life. I want to read more this year and for the rest of my life. You learn so much of life and from the world by reading. If people hurt you, books will always be there for you. You cry, laugh and just feel every feeling while reading a good book.

C – Cats & CuΓ©ntame como pasΓ³ πŸˆπŸ“Ί

I love cats. I used to be a dog person too because I was always carrying about the dogs in my neighbourhood in The Netherlands. However, I prefer cats now much more. They are so cute and fluffy 😍🐱😻 I don’t know if I would ever get a cat because I’m always travelling but I love to be around them. They are really cute except that random one cat who was biting me once πŸ˜‚

I love the Spanish serie CuΓ©ntame Como PasΓ³ so much. The actors are amazing. I also learn so much of the Spanish history with the serie. I cry, I laugh and just feel every feeling when I watch it. It’s about a Spanish family and shows how they live during that time. I can’t wait to watch the new season.

D – Dress πŸ‘—

I love to wear dresses in the Spring and Summer time. It’s basically my favourite thing to wear around this time. In Spain I can use them more because it’s much more sunnier than in The Netherlands. My favourite dresses are ones with flowers, my favourite green dress or jumpsuit.

E – Eating 🍴

I love food so much. I like to eat with friends or family at home or in a restaurant. I like to enjoy eating rather than to eat because you have to eat. Who doesn’t love to eat good food? πŸ˜‹ It’s such a nice pleasure.

F – Friends/family and flowers πŸ‘ͺπŸ’

Family is so important for me as well as my friends. Life is beautiful but also though so we all need a little bit of help from our family or friends. It’s so important to have the right people in your life who will love you and be there for you πŸ’•

I also love flowers so much. I love to see them blossom in the Summer months. Flowers are beautiful and they make me so damn happy 🌸🌻🌼 This picture is from the beautiful tulip park in Holland.

G – Grass 🌱

I love the smell of fresh grass and I love to sit on grass when it’s sunny. My favourite thing to do is laying in grass and watching the beautiful clouds go by. I also like to read a book on the grass.

H – Home and hearts πŸ‘πŸ’•

Home is where the heart is. I love home because it’s the place I feel the most safe. I love to live in a cozy home where I feel happy and at peace. I’m also blessed to have a home because I know there are many people living on the streets in this world. Thats just breaks my heart. We have to be happy of the things we have.

I also love hearts so much. They make me so happy. I always have stuff in my room covered with hearts. I also love to have clothes with hearts prints. I have to buy more of them.

I – Ice cream 🍧

Ice cream is one of my favourite things to eat in life. I love soft ice cream, italian ice cream and just everything about ice 🍦🍨. My favourite ice cream is italian ice cream and especially the chocolate, chocolate mint chip and coconut flavour. I also like to have a Mc Flurry at the McDonald’s. You can never eat enough ice and you can eat it whenever you want, not only in Summer. The picture below is from last Saturday when I enjoyed eating a delicious ice cream with discodip.

J – Juice🍹

I love when my mother makes natural orange juice or when we make together delicious fruit smoothies. It’s just the best. It’s healthy because it’s full of vitamins and also taste delicious.

K – Kiwi πŸ₯

I love eating kiwis so much. They are delicious and they are one of my favourite fruits. They are very healthy and full of vitamins too.

L – Love πŸ’–

Love is really the most important thing in life. You can love your parents, your husband/wife, your boyfriend/girlfriend or any of your friends. Every form of love is beautiful. Love is the essence of life. Life without love would be a hell. We can never have enough kindness and love in this world. Love just makes everything better in life.

M – Music & movies 🎢🎬

Music is life. I can’t imagine life without music. Music is always there for you. Music is there for you when you are sad, happy or just when you want to feel inspired. I love going to live concerts and meeting my favourite artists. I’m so blessed I live in this world where there are amazing artists and such amazing music to listen to 🎹🎧.

I love to watch movies at home. It’s been such a long time since I went to the cinema. I have to go again because I miss it. The last time I went I felt a panic attack upcoming so that’s why I don’t go anymore. I love watching movies because it makes you learn so much about life and transport you to another world.

N – Nature 🌍

Nature is just the most beautiful thing in this world. Nature is all that lives on this earth such as the flowers, trees and animals. I also love the different landscapes such as the mountains and the beach. I’m so blessed to live on such a beautiful planet. I also know that we have to take care of our planet. I can’t wait to discover and enjoy more nature this year 😍🌳 It always makes me feel so happy and calm. Nature gives us so many lessons such as to be present and enjoy the moment. This picture below is from the time I was in Mallorca. My favourite island ever! 😍 I can’t wait to go back. I have already been there 3 times.

O – Ocean 🌊

The ocean and the beach is my favourite place on this earth. The ocean is my home. It makes me feel so peaceful and so happy. I can’t wait to go to the sea soon and enjoy some surfing lessons and swim in the ocean. It’s the place where I feel young, wild and free. I love the quote of the surfer Laird Hamilton which is this one: “The biggest sin in the world would be if I lost my love for the ocean.”Β This is definitely that one quote which let you see how much I love the ocean.

P – Pizza, pasta, photography & Pretty Little Liars πŸ•πŸ“·πŸ’•

Pizza is my favourite food. I also love pasta so much. I love to eat this food so much. Who doesn’t love to eat a delicious pizza or delicious pasta? I always eat mini little pizzas at home. I also eat a lot of macoroni at home which my mother makes. She also makes a delicious natural tomato sause which makes it even better 😊

I also love photography. I have many cameras which includes a polaroid camera and a lomography camera. I want to make and share more pictures also on this blog to let you see my love for photography. My brother also loves photography for his whole life and has now his own wedding photography company with his wife.

One of my favourite series is Pretty Little Liars. I love to watch it even though sometimes I get scared. Who’s A haha πŸ˜‚ This serie is about 5 girls where one of them Alison get missed and they are trying to solve this mistery. There’s a person called A who’s blackmailing and stalking them all the time. They have to find out who it’s but things get complicated and people get murdered. I love all the actors and it’s such a good serie. I’m almost at season 6 now.

Q – Quotes πŸ“

I love quotes so much. We all need a good quote to live by. I find so much inspiration in beautiful quotes. Sometimes I find them on social media, on Tumblr, in a book or while watching a movie. It feels good to read a quote when you feel sad and want to feel less alone. They also makes me happy and feel inspired ✨

R – Rainbow and roses 🌈🌹

I love to see a rainbow. I think it’s such a beautiful wonder of nature. There always come sunshine after rain which is just like life. After bad times good times will come.

I also love roses so much. They are my favourite flowers among with beautiful daisies 🌼 Roses are so pretty to see and also smell so well. My favourite rose is the red rose.

S – Sun, Summer, sunflowers, singing and surfing πŸŒžπŸŒ»πŸŽ€πŸ„πŸ˜Ž

I had to think of so many things with the s. I already wrote ocean by the letter o so I didn’t use the sea here. I love the sun which gives us so many good vibes and warmth. Summer is my favourite season because of the sunshine and more daylight. Life is just so much prettier and better in Summer.

One of my other favourite flowers are also sunflowers. I love to ride along the sunflowers fields in Spain. In The Netherlands there’s less sunshine so they don’t grow that well as in Spain. Hopefully, one day I can make some beautiful pictures there and share them with all of you.

I love singing and surfing. They are one of my favourite hobbies. I used to sing in a choir in The Netherlands for 11 years. I really wish to sing more again. I also would love to go to a surf camp again in Spain this Summer. It’s been more than two years since I surfed. I also am craving that so much.

T – Tea and travelling 🍡✈️

Tea is my favourite hot drink. I always drink it even on hot Summer nights πŸ˜‚πŸ”₯ I just love drinking tea so much. My favourite brand is Yogi Tea because it contains quotes full of wisdom and also tastes delicious.

I love travelling so much. It’s my favourite thing to do in life. You learn so much from travelling. You learn from other new cultures and languages. Besides, meeting new friends is also so great while travelling. Travelling makes you have an open mind and I’m always into a great adventure alone, with friends or with family 😍

U – Underwater & universe 🐬🐳✨🌜

I love the underwater world. I don’t know if I will have courage to dive one day but I like snorkeling. I did that in Mallorca some years ago. I was amazed of seeing the beautiful fishes. The underwater world is also scary because of the unknown and there also creepy animals in the ocean. I still love to remind myself of the beautiful animals and corals there are in there and also the ones who still aren’t discovered yet. I also love swimming. It makes you feel so relaxed and calm.

I love astrology and I also love the universe so much. I love the stars, the moon, the sun and all the planets. It’s amazing how we live on this blue planet. It feels like a miracle. I love those Summer nights where I’m watching the stars and just think of how beautiful life is. I love the mistery of it.

V – Vacation πŸ–οΈπŸ•οΈπŸοΈ

Who doesn’t love to go on a nice vacation?! I love holidays. I love going away to a place I don’t know anyone & where I have never been. It always make me feel excited. There’s so much to see and do in this world. The world is waiting for you so whenever you get a chance take that vacation and goooo have fun πŸ’•

W – Writing and watermelon βœ’οΈπŸ‰

Writing is one of my biggest passions. That’s why I also began this blog. I love to write about topics I’m passionate about such as lifestyle, mental health, feminism, travelling, books, self care and self love. I also love to share more poetry in the future. I have always been a writer. I wrote in my diaries when I was younger. I still have some journals and I love scrapbooking. I also like to write handwritten letters. I also won some prizes while writing essays or poetry.

Watermelon is my favourite Summer fruit πŸ˜πŸ‰ I eat that so much in Spain during the hot Summer days. It’s so refreshing and so yummy.

X – Xmas & xoxo πŸŽ„πŸ˜˜

Xmas also known as Christmas is my favourite time of the year. I love Christmas because of spending time with your family, eating delicious food and feeling that Christmas spirit.

I love xoxo because I always use it to send texts or here on my blog. It means kisses and hugs. I also love it because it reminds me of my other favourite serie which is Gossip Girl. It’s about a group of friends that live in New York City and involves a lot of drama and gossips “You know you love me. xoxo Gossip girl.”

Y – Yoga girl πŸ§˜β€β™€οΈ

My biggest inspiration in life is Yoga Girl also known as Rachel Brathen. She’s a famous Swedish international yoga teacher who lives in Aruba with her husband Dennis and her little girl Lea Luna. I still am going to share a blog post I made about her soon. I love how authentic, vulnerable and honest she’s. I love her postcasts and everything she shares on the internet. I also want to take some yoga lessons again as I only did it twice and loved it. Hopefully one day I can go to a yoga retreat in her studio in Aruba πŸ˜πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ό That would definitely be a dream coming true. I also love that I’m in the Facebook community group. We are never alone. We can all be a Yoga Girl and inspire and help others πŸ’•πŸ™.

Z – zzz 😴

I love sleeping. Sleeping is also so important for your health. If I don’t sleep enough I can’t function well. I get more anxious and feel bad. Sleeping feels peaceful as it makes you forget your problems for a while.

That was my list from A to Z of my happy and favourite things in life. Of course, there might be more things but I didn’t want to add more. This post is already long haha. I hope you all enjoyed it. Could you relate to my my list? What are your favourite things in life? Let me know in the comments. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

New year goals for 2019 βœ¨

Hey lovely bloggers πŸ’•,

It’s never too late to write some goals down for this new year. Hopefully with writing this post I will stick to them and it will motivate me to reach them. I don’t like that much the new year, new me thing because I still feel the same but it’s just a different year not that much changed hahah πŸ˜‚ I prefer to stick with goals that I want to achieve this year. I also think that working to achieve goals also gives you confidence and strength. Reaching a goal is awesome but I think the way to reach those goals is also important. In this blog post I will write about my main 10 new year goals for 2019 ✨. My goals are not in any ranking.

1) Cope better with anxiety πŸ™

This is for me such an important goal to reach. I don’t know if I ever will be anxiety free but learning how to cope with it is important in order to feel good. If I have to try therapy this year then I will have to do that even though I’m scared. If I have to try other medications for my anxiety disorder then that’s okay too. I also will keep reading good self help books 😊. Hopefully I can also sleep better and have a better sleep schedule. I also want to take some yoga lessons and keep swimming. Moving my body definitely release anxiety and makes me feel more calmer and happier.

2) Face my fears πŸ’ͺ

I really have to face my fears this year rather than running away from it, escaping or hiding myself all the time. It’s my comfortzone to run away from them because I don’t know any other way to live life but it isn’t okay. I have to get my 4 wisdom teeth pulled out but I will do it one by one. Just writing about it already gives me anxiety. I need to do it this year in Spain. I don’t want to keep postponing the appointments until I really get pain and need to go urgently. The dentist here is really nice and understanding. I can do it and everything wil be okay πŸ’ͺ

3) Getting my first job πŸ’°

I’m scared of working because I never worked before. I only did an internship of 5 months here in Valladolid, in Spain last year. It was in The International Relations Office of the University of Valladolid. It was really nice. I did a great job. Working feels for me a big responsibility. I’m afraid to fail or that it will be too much to handle with having anxiety. I also keep applying for jobs but don’t hear anything back. I need to keep going. My dream is to work and live in Spain so I really do hope I can make this dream come true ❀️πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Έ Just last week I also applied to one job in Lisbon, Portugal. This week I will get a call back. I have been thinking that maybe it’s time to go outside my comforzone and just go for it. I’m nervous but also excited about it. It’s from a Dutch Website which is called Grenzelooswerk and they help you with everything.

4) Keep reading good books πŸ“š

I’m beginning to read again like I used to do when I was a child. I love it. It makes me feel so happy and calm. I love to read great books and forget the whole world around me. You learn so much about life, the world and just everything from reading πŸ“–. I will keep reading this new year. If anyone has some tips of books that I need to read they are very welcome. I love the books of John Green, poetry books from Rupi Kaur and The Spinster Club series books from Holly Bourne.

5) Writing great content on blog πŸ–‹οΈ

In this new year I want to continue writing more amazing posts for my blog. I want to write book reviews, my own written poems, singing covers and more posts about lifestyle, mental health, feminism, travelling, and self love. These are the most important themes of my blog. I hope you will all like it. I will also maybe look for a new design for my blog even though I find it difficult to make that. I hope that it will work out πŸ™

6) Asking for help when I need it πŸ’•

This is also an important goal for me to reach this year. If I struggle with finding a job or with my anxiety I need to know that it’s okay to ask people for help. If I can’t do something on my own it’s okay to admit that you need help. We all need help sometimes in life. I always thought that asking for help would mean that I’m weak and not strong enough. I’m learning that asking for help is a good thing to do and also takes a lot of courage. We are all in this together πŸ’ͺ

7) Go to a surf camp in Spain πŸŒŠπŸ„β€β™€οΈ

I didn’t go surfing for more than two years and I really miss it so much. I went a few times to a Surf Camp in the north of Spain and I loved it. I have to admit that I got scared of the big waves and I didn’t like some surf teachers pushing me through that fear. However, there are many surf camps with great teachers here in Spain who won’t push you that way. I love surfing even though I still can’t surf waves. I’m still a beginner. I had my own wetsuit but it’s too little now to wear 😭 I will buy a new one. Just being in the ocean, having fun and meeting new people is awesome. It’s such a great experience and I can’t wait to do it again this Summer 😍 I love the sea so much but I fear the amount of water and I fear drowning even though I can swim well so this goal is also about facing my fears.

8) Going to amazing concerts 🎢

Music is life 🎡🎼. I’m the happiest girl in the world when I listen to my favourite artists at a concert. I also love to meet them. These memories are for a lifetime. I can’t wait to go to more amazing concerts in Spain or in The Netherlands depends where I’m living. Going to concerts with my friends is one of my favourites things in life. I don’t like to be surrounded by many people so I’m never in the front line but I enjoy listening to live music so much. Without music we would all be so lost. For every mood there’s music to make us feel happy, less alone and inspired ✨

9) Travelling to new places 🌍

Travelling is also one of my favourites things to do in life ✈️. Travelling makes me so happy and so full of life 😍 This world is so beautiful and so magical. I love to discover new places, new countries, new cities and meet amazing people along the way. You learn so much from travelling such as going out of your comfortzone, speaking a foreign language or learning from another culture. I can’t wait to plan some exciting travels this year in 2019. Hopefully, I will also get a well paying job this year to save money for all the trips I want to make with my familiy, friends or alone. Keep on travelling πŸ’• Travel as much as you can, as far as you can and as long as you can. The world is yours.

10) Surround yourself with good people πŸ’–

It’s so important to be surrounded by good people instead of toxic people. They aren’t worth your time. Investing in good friendships or relationships is the best thing you can do. I’m thankful for my good friends, family and all the friends I met online. They only spread good vibes, love me for who I’m and respect me. That’s my tribe πŸ’• I can’t wait to meet more amazing people this year. I love to have fun with my friends and also love to have deep talks. When you surround yourself with good people you also feel more inspired and happier in life. Toxic people will only make you feel bad about yourself and will make you feel unhappy. Life is too short for negative vibes ✌️

Thank you all for reading this blog post. Did you like my goals? Can you relate to my new years goals? What are your goals for 2019? πŸŽ‰βœ¨ Let me know in the comments. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

Reflection on 2018 & happy new year to you all! πŸŽ‰βœ¨πŸ’•πŸ’«

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

Happy new year to you all! βœ¨πŸŽ‰ In this post I will talk about my 2018 and will show you how I celebrated New Year’s Eve. I’m glad I don’t have a cold amymore but just tonight I got my period so yeah that also sucks 😭 I’m glad I take medication for the cramps because otherwise I wouldn’t survive it. Besides, I’m also being anxious about my appointment of getting one of my wisdom teeth pulled out this week. I keep postponing the appointment. I know I have to do it but I’m so scared. H e l p. I also don’t want to do it in Holland. Here in Spain it’s much cheaper and the dentist understands my anxiety but I’m still so afraid and I just feel like I can’t cope. If anyone have some more tips to survive it I will be forever grateful πŸ™πŸ’• I can always take medication for anxiety if that’s enough to help me cope with it.

IMG_20181228_221316.jpg

We are already in 2019. A year has flown by. As usually I want to reflect on my year with this post and also write some important things for you all. Every year has its ups and downs. Every year consists of good things and bad things which happen to us. The most important thing is how we react to all these things. I know how hard it’s to stay positive in this sometimes dark world. I just keep believing that there are so many good things in the world and that there are indeed so many good people. You just have to find your tribe. I’m so glad I did.

I’m so happy with my blogging community, mental health community, Yoga Girl community and the goddess revolution community. I’m thankful that I joined these communities this year. They made me feel less alone and so much happier. If I’m in Holland I will maybe go to a meet up with some yoga girls. I also really wish that we will continue to all be friends and hopefully one day we will all meet ✨ I know the universe brought us all together for a reason which is to be connected with awesome people, share our struggles and feel supported.

I learned a lot this year. I learn every day from this world. This year I realized that there are truly lovely people who care about you and want you to be happy. I learned that it’s better to have a few good friends than a million of fake friends. The ones who love you will always be there for you no matter what. I learned that true love exists when I saw my brother getting married in August in Spain. I learned that this life is an adventure. Sometimes we win and sometimes we loose. We learn from every experience. I also learned that it’s okay if I’m not where I want to be in life. I still have a long way to go. I will find a career I love and will keep growing. It all takes time, pacience and trust in myself. I have to love myself, believe in myself and know that I can make my dreams come true such as working and living in Spain ✨

I also went to my first feminist strike in Valladolid, in Spain on International Women’s Day on the 8th of March with my mother. This was such an empowerful event. I never went to a demonstration before. I really wish 2019 will be the year that less women will be suffering from violence. I wish that women and men have the same human rights. Together we are starting a revolution. This is just the beginning. 2019 will be the year where women can be themselves, love themselves and love each other πŸ’•

This year I also learned that music is the best thing in life 🎢 I would be lost without music. I went to so many amazing concerts such as the OperaciΓ³n Triunfo 2017 concert in Madrid with my friend Maria πŸ’• OperaciΓ³n Triunfo makes me so happy and full of life. I also enjoyed the concert of Pablo Alboran, Chenoa, Hombres G and Celtas Cortos with my mother in Valladolid. I also enjoyed so much the concert of Sofia Ellar with my friend Maria. I can’t wait to see her again. It was so lovely to meet Sofia and get a picture with her. She’s the best and I can’t wait to see her singing again 😍

This year I began to read again a lot which I loved to do so much when I was younger. I will continue reading this new year. I also kept writing and being creative. I hope to create more amazing content on this blog. Writing is amazing. I travelled to Madrid, Granada, Santander and Somo. I discovered Somo which is a beautiful surfing village in the north of Spain. In 2019 I really want to go to a surf camp again πŸ„β€β™€οΈπŸŒŠπŸŒž. I didn’t go surfing for more than two years. I miss it so much. It’s also so good for my mental health. The sea is my home and cleans my soul. The beach is my favourite place on this earth. I can’t wait to travel to more amazing places and meet more amazing people.

Somo, Santander (September 2018)

FB_IMG_1546375268526.jpg

Granada, Andalucia (July 2018)

FB_IMG_1546375301138.jpg

La RΓ‘bita, Mediterranean Sea, Granada (July 2018)

FB_IMG_1546375261807.jpg

Madrid (March 2018)

FB_IMG_1546375125136.jpg

Maybe for some of you this year was a hard year. Maybe some of you have lost someone close to you. Maybe you just didn’t felt okay and were struggling. I’m here for you. It’s okay to grief. It’s okay to not be okay. It’s okay to feel sad. Feelings change and emotions change but it all takes time. Try to not be hard on yourself next year. Remember, I’ll will always be there for you πŸ’• I hope you will invest in self love and self care this new year because that’s the most important thing that matters. I also encourage you all to surround yourself with people who love you and who bring you only good vibes because you deserve that ✨.

I celebrated my New Year’s Eve in Valladolid, in Spain. I decided to not go out with my friends. I also didn’t go out last year. I used to party every year but I don’t feel in the mood anymore. I have to do what feels good to me. I went to the hairdressers in the afternoon to cut the dead ends, my bangs and they made curls in my hair. I love to look good for myself. I dressed up at home and did my make up. My mother and I went to the house of the mother of the wife of my brother. We celebrated all together New Year’s Eve: Rafael, my mother, VΓ©ronica, VΓ©ronica’s mother and her brother. We enjoyed eating delicious Spanish food.

We ate cheese, jamon serrano, chorizo, bread and chicken. I didn’t eat the fish because I don’t like fish so much haha πŸ˜‚ At 12 o’clock we watched the television and ate the 12 grapes. We also had champagne πŸ₯‚. It’s a tradition in Spain to eat the 12 grapes. They say it brings luck. We watched television where we were hearing beautiful music and we played Spanish card games. I really loved it so much. I love playing games with my family. At 3.30 am my mother and I went home and we stayed in watching some television. We went to bed at 6 am pretty late but doesn’t matter because it’s a special night. I’m glad I didn’t go out because as soon as we were home I got my period haha. On New Year’s Day we just stayed in and chilled. I saw the movie Grease. I just love that movie & the music so much 😍 I also saw the movie Paper Towns which I love so much from John Green. I already saw this movie with my best friend one day and loved it.

l wish you all an amazing new year full of love, happiness and luck πŸ€βœ¨βœŒοΈ Stay strong & stay safe. We are all in this together πŸ’ͺ I love you all so so so much ❀️. Thank you all for reading. How was your New Year’s Eve? Did you stay at home or did you went to a party? Which are your goals or dreams to achieve in 2019? I would love to know. I will speak to you all soon in my next blog post.

IMG_20190101_050820_592.jpg

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina

Spanish spoken poetry video: We are all Laura πŸ’œ (Violence against women)

Hey lovelies πŸ’•,

Before I begin with this short blog post I would like to say that I have a giveway going on my Instagram. You just have to follow me there, like my picture and comment why you want to win. You also need to be Europe based. I just wanted to give something back. I’m so thankful for all your support and love I have on my blog and on that Instagram account. I love you all so much 😍😍😍.

Before I post some Christmas blog posts I wanted to post this blog post. I just needed to share this here. I also shared it on my Instagram: Poetry video. This is my Youtube account which I never use but I just felt the urge to share it there too. My video on my main account of Instagram already had more than 1500 views and more than 100 likes which is just so much wow. I have never made a video reading one of my poems before but tonight is the night that I’m going to do it. I wrote it in Spanish because it’s about a Spanish girl but I will also translate it in English down below. I just had to write about what happened. This poem is for all women who are suffering from violence against women in every form possible. You are not alone. Together we are stronger πŸ’ͺ. They will not silence us.

Laura is a Spanish girl who was only 26 years old when she got missed a few days ago in Huelva in Andalucia. That’s in the south of Spain. She was a teacher in that village. She was missing and never came back alive πŸ’”πŸ˜’. They found her body on Monday half naked. I have to say that there’s one mistake in my poem which is that she was running. Right now they are investigating how she died. I saw the Spanish news and they said one man which was a neighbor from her killed her. He already killed a woman a few years ago and was in prison. I really don’t know why they let this crazy man free.

He locked her into his car and wanted to rape her but she resisted. Then he hit her with something on her head. She died a few days later. We still don’t know where the body was the days she was missing. It’s just a horrible story 😒. Again, another victim of violence against women. With all my frustration and pain I’m feeling right now I just needed to express my emotions in this poem. You can read my English translation of this poem down below:

We all are Laura

She was called Laura

She only had 26 years

A year less than I’m

She was a teacher

She went running and never came back

She got murdered

We all are Laura

We don’t want to be afraid when we are walking alone at night

We don’t want to be afraid because we are a woman

We don’t want to have our keys in our hands to enter fast our home

We don’t that men see us as an object

We don’t want to live in a patriarchal world

We don’t want that the world judge women when they are getting raped

We want to be free, protected by society and treated with respect

Free, healthy and safe is what we want to be

It’s enough!

Not one more!

We are all Laura ❀


Spanish version:

Laura somos todas

Se llamaba Laura

TenΓ­a tan sΓ³lo 26 aΓ±os

Un aΓ±o menos que yo

Fue profesora

SaliΓ³ a correr y no volviΓ³ nunca mΓ‘s

Fue asesinada

Laura somos todas

No queremos tener miedo por la noche cuΓ‘ndo andamos solas

No queremos tener miedo por ser una mujer

No queremos tener las llaves en la mano para entrar pronto a casa

No queremos que los hombres nos vean como un objeto

No queremos vivir en este mundo patriarcado

No queremos que el mundo nos juzgue a las mujeres cuΓ‘ndo somos violadas

Queremos ser libres, protegidas por la sociedad y tratadas con respeto

Libres, sanas y salvas eso es lo que queremos

Basta ya!

Ni una mΓ‘s!

Todos somos Laura ❀️


I know almost none of my followers can speak Spanish but the words sounded better in Spanish. I wanted to share both the original Spanish version and also the English translation. Maybe, in the future I will also make a video of the English version.

Thank you all for watching my video and for reading this poem. Did you like this poem? What are you thoughts of the topic of violence against women? Are you also a feminist? I’m a feminist by heart and will forever continue to spread awareness about this topic. Together we can make a change. They will not silence us πŸ’ͺπŸ’œ.

Much love πŸ’•,

xoxo Christina