Dec 2019 – Sea of words

I’m so done people making choices for me

31 Dec 2019

Hey lovelies 💕,

I prepared another blog post but I think it has to wait. I really need to share my feelings and thoughts and I can only do it here in my safe space 🙏. I’m in Spain right now and again I feel so bad. It feels like every time I’m in Spain now I get a mental breakdown 😢. It’s horrible because it’s my fav place ever and I’m always so happy to be here. It’s heartbreaking that I’m again so sad, so anxious and so angry. I don’t want to feel bad in Spain again. I will tell you all about it in this blog post. It’s about people making choices for me. I’m sorry if this post is depressing but it’s just how I’m feeling. It’s also always when I feel the worst that I can speak the truth out loud in an authentic and vulnerable way. Maybe it will help others too who are feeling the same way. At the end, we all feel the same things just at different times. The picture below is me crying so hard. I just want to be really honest about that. Maybe it’s a cry of help but it just feels good to share on here.

The flight went well except that we had to walk so much because our luggage was in a different terminal. I’m exhausted from the trip to be honest. We ate some delicious pasta from the airplane, a bread with jamón serrano and I ate some delicious 😋 yoghurt ice cream with smarties. We took the train to our home from Madrid. The bad stuff began when we talked with my family in The Netherlands.

I had an appointment for going to the dentist a few days ago in the afternoon and my mother in the morning for control. My family didn’t forget that and my mother said I wasn’t going that day but another day. I’m really exhausted. Then my family said well if you don’t go and come back to Holland then I will make an appointment to go there in the hospital. In Holland you can’t just go to a clinic or private thing because they aren’t specialized with getting wisdom teeth out. It cost more and you have to go to the hospital 🏥. The hospital makes me even more scared.

I said okay and we hang up. It was then when I felt so angry, anxious and sad. I can still feel my heart beating so fast 😢😔 I told my mother the most horrible things like I want to be dead. I wanted to run away and never come back. I slammed the doors so hard. Thank God nothing broke. I still feel bad. It’s not only the dentist thing which triggers me. It’s always people making decisions and choices for me in my life. Saying when I have to go to the dentist. Having to do things I don’t want to. I often do it because I’m a people pleaser. It’s not good. I’m so done with it. I’m always anxious of people being angry at me.

I don’t have the energy anymore. I really don’t. Yes of course I know I have to go to the dentist but just when I feel ready for it which is of course never because it’s a real phobia. I’m waiting for an infection silly me…. 😢. I know our family wants the best for us but not in a good way sometimes. You can’t just force someone. I just would like to feel that sense of having some control over my life. Now I feel that others control my life. I feel obligated to go. It isn’t healthy for me that lack of control over my own life. It’s draining me.

Also clearly some people doesn’t understand my anxiety or any other mental illnesses. It’s so hard to feel so many feelings when someone just don’t understand you. I now I have to calm down but I feel like I don’t want to speak to anyone anymore. I don’t want to see anyone. How can I live my own life when I still feel others have so much influence on me? A few years ago I went to a mental health worker for anxiety and she told me that some people have too much influence on me. I really do love them all but I think she’s right because I just feel like I can’t make my own decisions which at the end makes me so unhappy and anxious in life. It’s important to be able to make your own decisions and live life the way you want.

I know I really have to go to the dentist but it’s just a big phobia I have. I don’t know how to overcome it. At the end all worries are in our mind and it’s nothing like I expect it. Then some people will say you see, you were afraid of nothing. Well, yes but that’s because I suffer from anxiety. That’s also the reason I don’t know if therapy would work for me because my family isn’t in favor of that. I also don’t know if that would benefit me. I just know that after 26 years living on this earth 🌎 it’s time for me to make decisions on my own.

Maybe, I also overreact now much more because I’m so exhausted and didn’t sleep well and enough last night. I also feel so lonely lately. I feel like some friends don’t understand me as well and ignore me. I get angry so easily. I’m not doing okay again and it hurts. I don’t want to see people who don’t care about me. I feel also like I’m hurting my mom which is the one I love the most in this life. It breaks my heart to see her suffering because of me 💔😢. I don’t want to die of course but I also don’t want to feel like this and live life this way because it hurts me.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope it made any sense. Sorry for the rant. I don’t even know why I’m always apologizing for feeling my feelings. I’m here for you all too ❤️ What do you think of all of this? Any advice? Do you also feel like others decide decisions for you in your life? I would really appreciate any thoughts, messages or advice 💖🙏.

Love you all so much 💞,

xoxo Christina

Merry Christmas to all of you! 🎄💖💃🌟✨🎅

24 Dec 2019

HO HO HO lovelies 💞,

In this blog post I will share some pictures of my Christmas, some thoughts about Christmas and wish you all a Merry Christmas 🎄. I’m still feeling a bit bad. Sometimes I have some cramps or pain in the right side of my stomach. I’m thinking that maybe it could be ovulation pain. My parents thought the same. I hope to feel better soon. At least I have less headaches and my throat is doing better again too. I also have had some problems with my blog as my posts don’t show up in the public reader when you search some tags. I don’t know why. Hopefully, anyone can help me out with this. I would really appreciate that. I was also packing before Christmas to go to Spain this weekend to be able to enjoy Christmas without stressing about that 😂.

Now, let’s talk about Christmas time again. We can get pressured around this time of the year because we are bombarded with positive messages of being happy and of having to enjoy Christmas. While I’m a bit struggling with my health I find it difficult to just be happy because I have to do. I think that’s an unrealistic thought. We have to enjoy Christmas on our way. Do what you love to do. Spend time with your loves ones. Eat what you want to eat and don’t feel any pressure by it. I’m here for anyone who needs it 💞🙏. It’s okay if your Christmas isn’t happy or if you are struggling. I’m here for you and wish you all the love you need. You are not alone.

This time of the year always makes us reflect on this past year. It make us think of all the people we love. It can make us feel sad and happy. This time of the year can be a hard time for those who are missing someone. I’m thinking of those who are struggling these days with their mental health, physical health or any other struggle of life. You are in my prayers 🙏✨ .

I also really do think that Christmas is about giving and don’t like the consumism and materalism stuff 🎁. We don’t have much presents with Christmas because we already celebrated Sinterklaas before. I got amazing presents which you can read in this blog post. I always like to give money for charities and help others in need, not only during Christmas time. A few days ago I donated €15 for Prinses Máxima Centrum which is a hospital dedicated for children with cancer in The Netherlands. I hope my money can help the investigation to make more children better. I also know a little child who has leucemia and is being treated there. She’s a little child, only 6 years old. I know them because of my choir. I wish that she and every little child can get better. They all deserve that so much. I think it’s so important to donate money to good charities and help people in need.

I encourage anyone to give something back this Christmas and whenever you can. Christmas isn’t all about presents, food and all that materialistic stuff. Christmas is about making other people happy and being there for people who need it the most 💕 Make a change and please donate to any charity you like. You will be so thankful and happy that you did. You can also help someone without giving money but give them your time, love and showing them your heart. If someone you know or a stranger is struggling, be there for them. Be the light in those dark times 💡. Everyone needs someone sometimes.

I will give this love and light this time to the ones I love and to the ones who need it. We can be each other lights. We can give that light to someone who’s struggling in the darkness. Be that light for someone in need. If that could safe someone’s life and make them feel better then that’s all what counts. There’s nothing what makes me more happier than seeing someone smile because of something I did or some words I said. I wish all of you so much happiness that your heart will glow from golden glitter.

Christmas time for me begins on the 23th of December because it’s such a special date before Christmas. It makes me cry writing and thinking about it 😭. It’s the wedding anniversary of my parents 💒. This year they are already 43 years married. I wish them many more years of happiness, luck and love to come. I love them so much 😍. They are the best parents I could wish for. Thank you mama and papa for always being there for me and for making me believe that real love exists. I’m so blessed to have them in my life. I really can’t live without their love. When I think of someone dying I cry and panic but I have to tell myself to live in the present and that everything is okay now. My daddy was so sick and almost died when I was 11 years old because of an infection in his pancreas and many complications so this universe give him a new opportunity to live. I’m so thankful for that. In the evening my parents are going to the cathedral with an old lady they know. My mother used to clean her house. I used to sing “The nine lessons and carols” but I’m not in that choir anymore. I don’t go because sometimes I get anxiety because of memories. I always use this time to enjoy a bath 🛀 with a Lush bath bomb and paint my nails 💅. I love to get ready for Christmas and take time for myself. I need me time.

The 24th of December we always celebrate Christmas with the family but this time we celebrated it with the whole family on the 26th which is boxing day. It’s the Second Day of Christmas in The Netherlands. On Christmas Eve my brother Rafael and Verónica came to our house and we ate a delicious simple meal. This time my brother, his wife, me and my mother aren’t going to the cathedral but to the church near to our house for the mass. It’s really a tradition to go to church with Christmas 🎄⛪. I’m Catholic but don’t know if I believe in God but yes I believe in something, in the universe for sure. There’s a beautiful choir singing. I always feel more safe in this church as it’s more familiar. I don’t want to see all people I know asking questions about my life like when I go to the cathedral. The mass was beautiful. It always makes me feel the Christmas spirit.

I also always wear this Christmas costume like Santa Claus because I enjoy wearing it. My bestie said haha are you going to wear again that wore dress?! 😂🤶 Lol, it’s a bit short that’s why she said that. I never wear it outside though haha it’s way too cold for that. It makes me feel sexy and beautiful. I still can wear it so yeah I enjoy to wear it at home. My family also loves it especially my 4 year old niece. It’s a tradition for me to always wear it until I don’t fit it.

On Christmas day the 25th I enjoyed watching some Christmas movies 🎬 with my parents. Maybe my mother and I would go to the appartment of my brother to see their Christmas tree. The next day, on Boxing Day we celebrated Christmas with the whole family which means with my parents, my two brothers and their wifes and my little niece. We ate a delicious meal which was some meat, potatoes with different sauces and salad. As dessert we had fruits, red fruit mascarpone ice cream 🍨 and also blackberry juice which my father makes. I loved that so much as it’s very special and so sweet 😍. His mother also made it when she was alive so the tradition continues. We had such a nice and peaceful time together.

I had a beautiful Christmas time. I also want to say thanks to the mother of my ex lol because we always sent present to her and she to us. It’s already 7 years ago when he broke up with me during Christmas time but I’m finally these last years a bit happy with Christmas and don’t feel that dark cloud so much because of that horrible memory when I felt my world breaking in pieces 💔. I’m thankful for her beautiful presents which will arrive a week later. I’m also thankful for all the Christmas cards I got from pen pals, blogging friends, friends and family 💖. I feel all your love. I’m also thankful for the presents I got from Elsie. I loved your presents so much. She sent me this beautiful notebook and the presents you can see below. Thank you Sophia for your amazing presents too. I loved the nail polish as I really need some new ones as most of them are dry haha. I also loved the plate and the wallet. Turqouise is such a beautiful colour. I’m really blessed to be friends with you all. From my brother and his wife I got snowman marshmallows 😍⛄ I love to put them in a cup of hot chocolate. It’s delicious 😋

I hope you all will enjoy a beautiful Christmas with the ones you love 💖. Merry Christmas to all of you! I wish you all love, happiness and luck. I’m so blessed to be part of this beautiful community. I think that’s the best Christmas present I could wish for. Be safe lovelies and enjoy Christmas time on your own way.

Thank you for reading this blog post about Christmas time 🎄🎅✨. I hope you all liked it. How do you celebrate Christmas? Did you enjoy it? What are some traditions you do on Christmas? Let me know lovelies. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

I love you all so much 💞,

xoxo Christina

Music of November 🎶💞

17 Dec 2019

Hola lovelies 💕,

I’m not feeling well this week because I have stomach cramps and aches. I don’t eat much just rice and veggies and not too much food. I also feel sometimes a strange feeling in my throat like something is stuck there which of course can’t be true. I can’t have a stone in my throat lol but it feels like that. It comes and goes. Maybe, it would be better to go to the doctor here or in Spain. My mother gets angry when I say here I don’t feel well and don’t go to the doctor. I can understand her but I’m just so anxious always to go to the doctor 😢. I hate it. Maybe I’m just getting sick. I also feel like I have to be happy and healthy and all stuff for Christmas when I can’t. I think we have to let this unrealistic thought go and just focus on ourselves and on our loved ones this holiday time. It’s okay if Christmas isn’t perfect, if we are feeling unhappy or unwell. Do what you love to do and do what you can do. Our health always comes first 🙏. Now, I will share some good music I listened to in November. Some very good Spanish songs have been released and some good songs of Taylor Swift have been released. I’m excited to share them all with you.

Jonas Brothers – Like it’s Christmas

“You make every day feel like it’s Christmas“

I mean this had to be the first one to share in this list. It’s a Christmas song 🎄✨ of the Jonas Brothers yeahhh. I love it so much. It’s a fun song and really makes me happy. It’s a great song to get in the festive mood.

Harry Styles – Watermelon sugar

LOVE THIS SONG 💖🍉. My love for Harry Styles has only grown more and more. Sign of the times is my fav song of him from his first album. This song is so good!!! His voice is just so amazing. It’s one of my fav songs of this new album of him. I will share songs of his new album the next month.

Maroon 5 – Memories

“Here’s to the ones that we got
Cheers to the wish you were here, but you’re not
‘Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
Of everything we’ve been through
Toast to the ones here today
Toast to the ones that we lost on the way
‘Cause the drinks bring back all the memories
And the memories bring back, memories bring back you

There’s a time that I remember, when I did not know no pain
When I believed in forever, and everything would stay the same
Now my heart feel like December when somebody say your name
‘Cause I can’t reach out to call you, but I know I will one day, yeah

Everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody hurts someday, aye aye
But everything gon’ be alright
Go and raise a glass and say, aye”

This song was released in September. I heard it so many times in shops and on the radio and of course it has to come on a music list. Maroon 5 is amazing. I love them. This song is so beautiful and also emotional. We have to be thankful for the ones who are present in our lives right now and for the ones who left us. The memories of the ones who left us are always in our hearts. I’m thankful that nobody I know died this year. Remember, everything will be alright.

Pablo Alborán ft. Ava Max – Tabú

This collaboration of Pablo Alborán and Ava Max is so good! 💕 I love it. Pablo Alborán is one of my fav male artists in Spain. Ava Max is also such a good singer. It sounds so chill and makes me wanna dance. I always love Spanish artists singing together with other artists who sing in English.

Miki Núñez ft. Sofía Ellar – Coral del arrecife

This is such an amazing song! I love Sofia Ellar which is definitely one of my favourite Spanish singers. I also love Miki so much. Miki represented Spain in Eurovision this year. This is a happy song about the coral reef. It’s about the beach, my happy place. I can’t wait to go to the beach soon. I WANT SUMMER BACK 🌞😔. NOW. ~~Cancel Winter.~~

Pablo López – Mama no

WOW such a beautiful song. Pablo López is such a great artist. His music is always so sensitive and so touching. This song is about that everyone critizes you but don’t know you. This is also so relatable. People judge others so easily when they don’t even know that person.

Alli Tolley – Tangled hair

“Surely there must be a life out there for me
Oh Lord, please don’t let this be the plan you have for me
‘Cause I don’t want this to be the way my story ends
I’m tired of the label and I’m tired of the pain
I’m tired of the looks up and down
To see how I’m doin’
If it’s still who I am
I’m tired of my body being seen as who I am
I’m tired of this life
I’m tired of this life
Don’t you get, I’m still a mess sometimes
Please understand
That my mind is as tangled as my hair sometimes
That my mind is as tangled as my hair
I’m not okay just yet
But I’m working on it“

This is an emotional and inspiring song from Alli who left us way too early. She commited suicide 💔. Mental illnesses are the worst. I don’t know her but my pen pals knew her and were really shocked about the news. The lyrics is so relatable and she has such a lovely voice. I’m really sad that she couldn’t go on anymore. We can’t save anyone but really sometimes it’s all I want. I was sad to hear the news too 😢 She was so talented and inspiring. Such a beautiful soul. May you rest in peace.

Taylor Swift ft. Shawn Mendes – Lover remix

AAAAH THIS IS MY FAV SONG OF TAYLOR’S NEW ALBUM. I love this remix so much with Shawn Mendes 😍. The voices are so good and so beautiful together. I wish to see them both live one day. They are amazing.

Taylor Swift – Beautiful Ghosts (From The Motion Picture “Cats”)

Such a mysterious and magical song! Taylor’s voice is amazing. She writes songs so beautifully. ARTIST OF THE DECADE YASSSS MY QUEEN. She made this song for the movie Cats which is also a musical. I can’t wait to see this movie soon.

Sofia Ellar Ft. Ana – Ana (New version)

Sofia already released this song in her last album but this time she made a version with her mother. Her mother is called Ana and that’s what the song is about. I love it so much. They both sing beautifully and you can feel the love and emotion through this song. Our mothers are always there for us. I love mine so much too. I’m so grateful for all the love. I also love Spanish music so much as the language is so lovely and so sweet. I really find it a romantic language.

David Bisbal – Mucho más allá (Frozen 2)

David Bisbal is a famous singer from Spain who also got famous from the Spanish talent show Operación Triunfo years ago. This song is for the movie Frozen 2 in Spain ⛄. I still have to watch this beautiful movie. I love this song. His voice is amazing. In English this song is called “Into the unknown”.

Alfred García – 1016/El círculo rojo

Alfred just released a new version of his album 1016. There are 4 new songs in there and I’m ging to share my two favourites. I love him so much. He always write such good songs. All his songs are written by himself. He is a mental health warrior. He deals with anxiety and depression. Now he is doing better. He is also always such a caring and sensitive person. His songs are so beautiful. I can’t wait for the next new songs of him.

Alfred García ft. Txarango – Crema la nit

LOVE THIS SONG 😍💖. They sing about Crema La Nit which is a typical fiesta in Valencia which is during Las Fallas. I love Catalan. It’s such a cute language and it sounds so good. It makes me feel calm and happy to listen to this song. I also like Txarango as it’s a band from Catalonia.

Alfred García – Amar volar al invierno

His voice is amazing and this song also makes me feel so peaceful. He is so talented. It’s really such a lovely song. I also love his “buenas noches” which means good night in Spanish at the end of the song. It’s really cute.

Thank you all for reading this blog post and listening to these songs. I hope you liked them. What was your favourite song from my list? What was your favourite song in November? Any Christmas songs you like? Let me know lovelies. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love 💕,

xoxo Christina

Sinterklaas haul yeahhh 🎉🎁😍💞

10 Dec 2019

Hola lovelies 💕,

Today I will share with you all a nice Sinterklaas haul 🎁. We celebrated Sinterklaas last Friday at my brother’s appartment with the family. It’s a typical Dutch celebration. I always am looking so forward to this celebration all year long 🎉. The official day of the celebration is the 5th of December but we celebrated it on the 6th. They say that Sinterklaas is a saint which comes from Spain 🇪🇸 in a boat. If you have been a good child you would get presents. If not, they would make pepernoten of you which are some Dutch sweets and you would be put into the zak van Sinterklaas which goes to Spain hahaha. Some people make surprises on this day, hide presents and make poems. Our family just buys presents for each one of us. I’m excited to share with you all the amazing stuff which I got this year.

A yoga mat!!! 🧘‍♀️

Finally, I got a yoga mat 🙏✨. I’m so happy with it. I really hope to use it much at home. I love to practise yoga with Adrienne on Youtube. I have to do it more. I only took some lessons in my life and I really want to go to some lessons when I have more money. The yoga mat is pink and from a real Yoga brand. I don’t know which one because my brother and his wife didn’t told me hahah. It was a nice surprise. It was put into a big box of Samsung and my brother wrote Samsung unstoppable as it’s that slogan. I really do love this yoga mat as it’s beautiful so I really need to get myself on the mat now. My biggest inspiration alive is Yoga Girl 😍 and I love the Yoga Community. I hope to be able to go to one of her lessons and also go on a retreat in Aruba 🇦🇼 one day. This is already the first step in making my dream come true. Now, I want to practise it more and become better in it. It could also help me with my back pain and it’s so good for your mental health too. It would make me feel more calm like meditation also does.

Flow magazines 📚

In the box where the yoga mat was in there were also 5 Flow magazines. I love the Dutch and Belgian Flow magazine. It’s so creative and inspiring. I love the quotes and the stories written. You can find stories of mental health, how to live a simple life, tips to increase happiness and many other inspiring stories. It’s about letting life flow without any hurry and staying in the present moment. With the magazine also come free goodies such as a laptop sticker, notebook, quotes, little cards, stationery. I love that so much.

Flow tear-off calendar 🗓️

I love those kinds of calendars so much. I always have one in my room. This year I had one of The Bucketlist with quotes and things to do. This year I have again one from Flow 🌸. It isn’t only a magazine, they sell lots of stationery and other things too like this amazing calender. I love the quote on it “It is all about finding calm in the chaos”. This year it comes full of inspiring quotes, advice, photography, life lessons, insights, tips and pages about mental health, psychology and lifestyle. It’s great to begin the day with reading something inspiring ✨.

Flow book for paper lovers 🌸😍

THIS IS DEFINITELY ONE OF MY FAV PRESENTS EVAH!!! 😍 This book from Flow is so amazing and really heaven for any stationery lover. It cointains beautiful writing paper, stickers, quotes, cards, posters and even wrapping paper for presents. I already have one at home but this is the seventh edition which contains much more beautiful and amazing stationery.

Christmas tree pen 🎄🖋️

This is a beautiful Christmas tree pen I got. It even has some things on it like little bells haha 🎅. It’s really cute! Maybe it’s a bit difficult to write with it but it could be a nice decoration too.

Advent candle 🕯️

I got a beautiful hearts advent candle. I love it so much. Anything with hearts is always a must have! I’m the queen of hearts and have loads of stuff in my room with hearts. Yes, I’m that romantic and sensitive girl. The only bad thing is that we use electronic candles at home because my parents are afraid to use real candles ✨. I still hope to use this one one day hahah 😂.

Chocolate advent calendar 🗓️🍫

I love to have a chocolate advent calendar 😍. I can’t begin December without one. I have now two because my daddy also got me one when I came back from Spain. That one is a bit messed up because the chocolates got messed up but well now I can eat even more chocolate every day. I have to be careful I don’t get sick of too much chocolate.

Chocolate heaven 🍫🍫🍫

I got so much delicious chocolate. I love it so much. It’s typical to get letters of chocolate. I have got money out of chocolate, two chocolate letters with the letter C (one is with white chocolate with sea salt and the other one with milk), a white chocolate of Sinterklaas, spice nuts also called kruidnoten in The Netherlands with milk chocolate and white chocolats. I also got milk chocolate pralines in a beautiful package. Lastly but not least, I got a delicious marzipan with chocolate. I think I have enough chocolate now haha. Chocolate is just the best and a girl’s best friend ❤️👌.

Pickwick Joy of tea – Green tropical 🍵💞

Of course, I got tea as I love to drink tea so much. I love to drink Yogi tea which always comes with a quote. I like to try different teas 💖. This one is from Pickwick and it’s green tropical. It contains ginger, pineapple, coconut and lemon. I think this will be a delicious one.

Christmas socks 🎄

I love these Christmas socks from Primark so much. One pair is with a reindeer on it with little balls and the other one has Christmas balls and rings on it. I love them and I’m sure they are also very cozy.

A mug to paint 🎨

In Spain I have another mug that I still need to paint. Now, I got another mug to paint 💖. This one is a beautiful swan 🦢. I love to be creative so this would be a nice thing to do as I’ve never done this before. When the painting is finished you have to let it dry in the microwave. I hope it doesn’t explode lol 😂.

Squeeze animal 😍

This is the squeeze animal I lost in Granada this Summer. I had it in my bed in the hotel but the cleaners threw it away without knowing. It made me really sad. I’m happy to have got the same one back. It’s so cute and it’s good to squeeze it when I’m stressed. It makes me feel more calm 💜.

Beauty products 💖🚿

I got a pink Batiste Dry Shampoo which is the one of Blush – floral and flirty haha. I love it but I also have to use it a bit less because otherwise my hair feels sometimes a bit dry. It’s good for my bangs as that easily gets oily which I don’t like. I also got a Vogue Girl Deodorant. I love the cats one 😻. It smells so good.

Thank you all for reading this blog post. I hope you liked my Sinterklaas haul. Which present was your favourite of mine list? Did you love the stationery I got? What’s on your Christmas list this year? Let me know lovelies. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love 💕,

xoxo Christina

November favourites 💖🍴

3 Dec 2019

Hola lovelies 💕,

I’m happy that my November month turned positive because in the middle of November I felt so depressed, low and anxious in Spain 😢. I know it’s because I associate Spain now with going to the dentist which increase my anxiety. I just don’t want to feel those horrible feelings again as it makes me feel so bad. It’s just the worst. Sometimes I also think maybe the universe wants me to learn me something. I had a bad experience a few years ago with a dentist who said I was childish and was acting like a 15 years old because I was anxious and cried. This dentist in Spain is so lovely and nice so if I get all my wisdom teeth out there maybe that will cover the bad experience I had with that dentist in Holland and will feel less fearful in the future. The universe always give us situations to learn something from them 🌌. I’m happy to share with you now my favourites of November which includes eating delicious tapas with my friends, shopping time in the Primark, stationery shopping and finishing writing Christmas cards 🎄.

Things I did with my family 👪:

Tapas night with mamita 🍴

I enjoyed some delicious tapas with my mother 😍😋. This is a very funny story to be honest. We were in a famous bar in Valladolid to eat some croquetas. My mother heard some guys talking and she thought they were from another country. Suddenly they began to talk to us. One of them was from India and was working in a company in Chicago. The other man was Spanish and had his own company. They were both married. They invited us for some tapas, croquetas and a drink. My mother drank a glass of wine and I had mosto which is grape juice. Then they invited us to a second bar hahah my mother thought wow what?! It was nice to get all free food and drinks. In the second bar we ate some delicious jamón serrano. Then something uncomfortable happened for me. We talked about life and jobs and I said I was looking for a job. Then this Spanish man said he could offer me a job in the marketing sector in his own company. I laughed and didn’t say anything. He then said that I don’t have attitude and that isn’t good when you are looking for a job. Well, I’m not going to say anything about my anxiety and why I acted that way 😕. My mother asked for his contact details but that’s it. I don’t find it normal that a stranger says that to you. What do you think? I’m also always very careful and don’t trust people that easily. I’m not good in making choices too.

Dinner at Erchus 🍴

I had a delicious tortilla de patata with bread at Erchus. It’s not that far from us and cheap. My mother ate some delicious churros with chocolate ☕. This is typical Spanish and you often eat it during the cold Winter months. I love the chocolate but for a drink I prefer the hot chocolate even though this is the real chocolate drink.

Shopping time in Rio Shopping 🛒

One day we went to Rio Shopping in Valladolid. You have to take the bus to go there. I wasn’t feeling well in the bus twice. The second time was worse because I felt like I couldn’t breath. I know it’s anxiety but I guess it’s also because it’s always so hot everywhere which triggers my anxiety. I’m happy that afterwards we walked home from the city. I needed some fresh air. However, I enjoyed some shopping time in this big mall. I bought a nice book which is The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time in Fnac. I heard a lot of good things about this book 📖. My daddy has that book at home in Dutch. I also went to Primark with my mother and bought some nice things such as fluffy purple socks, frozen socks which I love, stationery set of Harry Potter, black heart panties, and a necklace from Disney which says be yourself which is already broken now. Afterwards, we went to Ikea and enjoyed some delicious hotdogs with fries 🍟. I also loved that we could drink as much as we want. I had some lemon drink.

Dinner at El Corte Inglés 🍴

I had a delicious dinner with my mother in the big shop El Corte Inglés 😋. We always love to eat sandwich ham & cheese with potatoes. My mother drank some tea and I had an ice tea. I also bought a blue striped jeans in Bershka. It’s been some time since I bought some clothes. I also bought some Christmas stickers 🎅🤶 at Tiger.

Watched the movie To all the boys I’ve loved before 💘🎬

Finally I watched the movie To all the boys I’ve loved before with my mother at home. I want to also buy this book and read it. This movie is about Lara Jean who writes letters to all of her past loves, the letters are meant for her eyes only. Until one day when all the love letters are sent out to her previous loves. Her life is soon thrown into chaos when her foregoing loves confront her one by one. I loved this movie so much! 😍 It’s a funny and romantic movie. I find the story very funny and the end is also so good. I wish I could have that happy ending too.

Buying stationery 🛍️✒️

I bought some amazing stationery with my mother at my favourite shop which is Action in The Netherlands. I bought some calligraphy rose gold pens, some nice stickers with dog and cats and quotes on it and a design paperpad deluxe with glitter which has 26 pages full of colours, quotes and unicorn print 🦄. I also bought a mystery designpad with all pages covered of the universe, stars, astrology signs and beautiful purple and blue colours. Aaaah it’s so damn beautiful! 😍✨🌌 I can use it to write quotes on it and sent that to my lovely pen pals.

Buying bath products and envelopes at Hema 🛀❤️

I bought some nice bath products 🛀 at the Hema. I bought hand cream with shea butter and eucalyptus oil and a glitter hair spray for Christmas 🎄✨ I love to care about my body with great products. They smell so well and I love the design and colours. I also bought some set of envelopes, three with bubble paper and the other 20 are self adhesive which is very useful.

Inspiring talks on the airplane ✨✈️

I had some good talks on the airplane this month. On the way to Spain I met a nice girl from Uruguay and the way back to Holland I met a guy from Spain. I had such a beautiful connection with him. It makes me sad that he doesn’t talk to me anymore but I’m happy that I had that conversations as sometimes you just need some good talks to get inspired and be more positive in life. We all need some positive words and some kindness. You can read about those talks in this post. I also met my lovely Spanish teacher at the airport in Madrid 🇪🇸.

Watching Junior Eurovision Song Contest 2019 🎶

I watched Junior Eurovision Song Contest with my mother in The Netherlands. I always loved to watch it because it’s so cute to see kids singing. Spain returned after 13 years again. I’m so proud Melani got the third place with the beautiful song Marte which is about climate change and plastic waste in the ocean 🌊. I wrote about her song in this post. The Netherlands got the fourth place with a dance song. I wished Spain would have won instead of Poland again. It was fun to watch.

Lovely things I did with my friends 💖:

Tapas night with my lovely friends in Haarlem 🇪🇸🍴

𝑰 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒃𝒚 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒉𝒆𝒍𝒑 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒎𝒚 𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔 💞

The tapas night with my friends was awesome as always. I ate with my lovely friends at @lacubanitahaarlem. This time we changed from restaurant as we always ate in El Pincho. I love both of these restaurants so much. The tapas were delicious, service was fast and they were friendly and it’s not that expensive 😍🤗🍴 I loved the albóndigas with tomato sauce, sweet potatoes with curry, quesadillas, croquettes, tomatoes with mozarella and jamón serrano with melon. I also drank a virgen cocktail with coconut syrup and pineapple.

We ate so much all together as we could eat as much as we want because it’s a fixed price. As dessert my friends enjoyed a brownie, velvet cake 🍰 and ice cream. I always eat the dame blanche which is vanilla ice cream with warm chocolate sauce and whipped cream 🍨. I can never have enough of that as it’s my favourite dessert. We were the last ones in leaving the restaurant hahaha 😂. Time flies when you are having fun. Afterwards, we went to see a bit of a live concert in café Stiels.

Thank you so much for this lovely evening my friends 💖. Whenever I’m with the people I love everything is fine. Thank you for always being there for me. I really needed to spend some time with my good friends as that’s also good for my mental health. It’s so important to be surrounded by people who actually care about you. Spanish vibes always 🎉 I’m so blessed to have you all in my life. Real friends are the ones who are there for you in good and bad times. I’m happy I found my tribe haha. Friends who love food are the best friends you can ask for 😍🍴 Friends forever 💗👬👭💃 We will see each other soon again. Love you all so much 😘 xoxo

Pen pal letters 💌

I got some lovely pen pal letters from pen pals in America. One was handwritten and the other one was typed. I love to receive mail so much as it always make me so happy. These two girls are from the Yoga Girl Community. I hope to meet them one day. I also get a nice letter from Jess. I loved the quotes and the lovely cactus stickers. It was all so cute 💞.

Finished writing Christmas cards 🎄

I wrote 32 Christmas cards for my family and friends all over the world. I’m sending 20 with the post. I always love to give and receive Christmas cards. It’s just such a nice tradition. I decorate them with washi tape, stickers and glitter. In some of them I also have a surprise which is a golden or silver star. I like to make them personal. I hope they will like them 😊.

Thank you all for reading this blog post. I hope you all liked it. What was your favourite from my list? What did you enjoy in November? Do you also write Christmas cards? Let me know lovelies. I will speak to you all in my next blog post.

Much love 💕,

xoxo Christina

Sea of words

Life is a beautiful chaos 💗✨

Month: Dec 2019

I’m so done people making choices for me

Merry Christmas to all of you! 🎄💖💃🌟✨🎅

Music of November 🎶💞

Sinterklaas haul yeahhh 🎉🎁😍💞

November favourites 💖🍴